So, as you read about A-Man's screaming and peeing adventures in my last post, be happy to know I have more for you to read about.
And of course it involves A-Man and pee (and bread crumbs!).
Last night, I took him knitting with me and we had a good time! I got a lot of knitting done (anything more than a round/row is considered a lot for me!), got to chat with friends and just relax.
The weirdest thing of the night was that A-Man didn't use the bathroom twice. The first time - for some reason - his pants were on backwards and because they're sweat pants with a drawstring, those strings were hanging in the back.
And because he doesn't quite grasp the whole stand and pee thing - neither do I plan to teach him (I'll let SH do that when they're ready) - the drawstrings fell in the toilet without my knowledge.
So he's doing his business and I can smell pee. When he hops off the toilet that's when I saw the drawstrings soaked in pee. Great.
But it could've been worse! The good thing out of this was that he was wearing splash pants, so I removed his sweat pants, tossed them in my backpack outer pocket and put his splash pants back on and that was that.
Before we left, I asked him repeatedly if he needed to use the bathroom.
"No. Ei. Noooooooooo!" was the response I was given.
Fine. We went to the grocery store to pick up a couple bits and pieces and went home.
We were 10 seconds from our door outside and he peed himself.
Filled his lined rubber boots with puddles. Yay.
We got upstairs, got cleaned up, went to bed and all was well.
Until 3:30 this morning. Oh yes. My lovely dog woke me up by scratching himself so hard while on the floor, that he was kicking our bed frame and shaking me like wild.
Oh and then A-Man soaked the bed and the protective sheet I have under the regular bed sheet had shifted.
So again, my poor brand new mattress smells like pee.
I'm not happy.
Then to top it off - he started to protest wearing a diaper. And by "protest" it starts with a bit of "no" then turns very quickly into screaming and screeching his head off and waking everyone up.
I stripped the bed and whispered/screamed how angry I was.
By this point, I'm so exhausted that I'm wide awake. So I got the kids buns because that's the most I can handle - at 3:45 in the morning - and suddenly my bed is caked in bed crumbs. Really.
I used to think crumbs in the bed was THE worst thing to litter a bed and never ate in bed...except when I was hiding away from the kids with ice-cream...
Then I discovered toddlers wetting the bed...which is 2nd to dogs or kids barfing in bed.
V-Man decides he's a champ. He wants nothing more than to jump on the bed and watch his favourite music on my phone.
I say sure- because it wasn't HIS fault he was woken up from a nice deep slumber. So I let him have my phone with the volume on low and by 5:30am - I was outside with the dogs. SH wasn't pleased but it really wasn't his fault he got woken up and not his fault he can't fall back asleep.
He stayed up until it was time to go to day-care and as the taxi was pulling up our drive-way - then decides that he'd like to go back home and sleep.
Tough cookies on that one.
Thankfully, A-Man and M-Girl managed to get another 2 hours nap in before the morning really started and I managed a light 15-20 minutes myself.
I was perky and excited for the boys to go to day-care, the dogs had already gone out, I had my bowl of Greek yoghurt with granola cereal and honey...and just wanted to squeeze in an episode of Glee (season 4 - no spoilers please!) before crashing.
I must've looked like death because the day-care staff asked if I was okay...oh boy.
Anyways, I did just that. I took A-Man to day-care, power-walked home, had a bit more breakfast, watched the first episode, did some laundry and dishes and plunked myself into bed with M-Girl and we were out for a solid 3-hours.
So one massive tantrum downtown after day-care today and I'm done.
Completely with a Finnish little old lady telling me what to do and to not cover his mouth as he screams the roof off that the whole bus stop commuters can hear (it's a block long-ish) and trying to shame me because he's not wearing mittens (his choice and he constantly rips them off otherwise) and even when he threw his hat at her (which is a kinder version of what I wanted to do by this point) - she still kept nagging.
Oh and he doesn't eat dinner at all. He prefers the likes of crackers and yoghurt - anything really that ISN'T supper...so I'm going to be buying this book soon. I already have Adam Mansbach's other book "Go the F*ck to Sleep!"
Alright, I'm out for the night - hopefully a deep and boring/quiet one.
BIMU
PS Turns out my neighbour's child also wet the bed last night (her protective sheet is better than mine) and when she told her child about A-Man doing the same, the child thought this was hilarious.
We don't.
Writing in comfort about crafts, food, family life and more while living in Finland.
Thursday, 30 October 2014
Tuesday, 28 October 2014
Thank God for Bed Time and Ben & Jerry's (and sales!)...
Now being a mother of 3 means that I try my hardest to ensure each child gets one-on-one time with each parent regularly throughout the week.
Perhaps it's going grocery shopping, walking around the second-hand store, going knitting (which usually involves a cookie for A-Man), grabbing a milk shake or some French fries...or cuddling at home.
Or - as fun as this sounds - going to your 3-year old check-up and getting the flu shot together.
Yeah I know - what a bucket of fun I am!
But! I tried to spice it up a bit!
The appointment was at 2pm which was a bit of an issue because nap-time at day-care is from 12-2pm.
So I picked him up at 12, and while his little friends were getting their snooze on - I busted him out of day-care and we went to the bus.
We went downtown and had McDonald's. We went to the fabric store to get me some solid cotton fabric (½-meters of 4 colours for my quilt and I plan to do some pinwheels for my next project!) which in all fairness - is also therapeutic shopping for me. I was predicting that the flu shot wouldn't go down well - and well...keep reading.
Then we took the bus to the Neuvola (children and maternal health clinic).
We got there in good spirits and I was thinking, "Holy f*ck! I might strike gold with this appointment - he's in SUCH a good mood!"
We had fifteen minutes to kill and he was very playful and showing off his little bus toy to another boy and girl there. He tried to interact with the boy - about his age - but the language barrier made it a bit tricky.
Well, we took advantage of this time and both used the bathroom, I weighed myself (blegh) and waited a bit.
Oh! Our turn!
So because he's 3 and because V-Man has autism and never had to have this kind of "special" appointment - I was excited!
Today we had a student nurse doing her practical training and our regular nurse wanted to see what A-Man can do.
Things to cover (things marked DD= didn't do - keep reading and you'll see why):
There were of course questions about diet, sleep, attitude, tantrums and how things are going at home and in day-care.
And of course, because he's turned 3 and hasn't been to the Neuvola in a year - we had to get him measured. Height, weight and head circumference.
This is where the crap hit the fan.
It took over 20-minutes to get his measurements. We tried his weight on two different scales and since I had just weighed myself (gained about 5 pounds - blegh!) and was quickly getting frustrated - I scooped him up and stood on the scale and we did some basic math to figure out that he weighs approximately 15 kg.
Fastest way to lose 15 kg for me! HA!
The height? Holy smokes that was a pain in the arse too. They have this measuring tape that adjusts along one wall and you just pull it down to the top of the kid's head and ta-da. Done.
No - he absolutely refused and decided running around protesting and proving he can in fact speak by shouting, "NO! EI! (Finnish for "no") YOU - GO AWAY! GO AWAY!" loud and clear....
I tried to not laugh and I tried to be serious and the tears were pouring out of my eyes - I was both amused and embarrassed...
Eventually, we decided we'd treat him like a baby and lie him down on the measuring tool for - babies. That was about another 10-minutes of fighting and me having to toss my whole upper-body weight on top of him (good thing I got that extra 5 pounds...) to pin him down so the nurse and her pupil could guess he's about 90-something centimeters.
He spotted my phone and decided he wanted to watch Moomins and decided a screaming fit was in order.
"Oh no you don't!" I grab him, yank his jeans off quickly because he needs to get a flu shot in his thigh...
The student and I are wrestling/holding him down in my lap - and the nurse quickly goes in for the jab...
Awesome! We're done! Let's get the heck out of here!
Nope.
She wants to see if he'll put away the toys he took out and had organized into a straight line.
Nope - he doesn't want to. He wants his mother to put on Youtube on her pokey phone and play some Moomins.
I say nay-nay and he goes wild. Full blast screaming that's so high pitched, I'm curious if the windows are cracking and if he triggered some sort of silent alarm to the police...fat tears running down his face, redder than a tomato and why is he grabbing his crotch?
Why is he dripping?!
Oh no. Why the f*ck is he GUSHING from his - oh my f*ck.
He's piss-pouring himself. It's not even peeing, it's not even a wee.
It's down-pouring pee (piss-pouring - courtesy of yours truly) in and out of his pants.
How can a child - who peed before we left day-care and before we walked into the room thirty-five minutes ago HOLD SO MUCH IN HIS BLADDER?!
Do I have a diaper for him? No.
Do I have spare clothes for him? No.
Do we have a car, where I could plop him into a car seat or on a towel or blanket (which I normally would have in a car - for the dogs) and zoom back home quickly? No.
Do I have any doggy poo bags for his wet clothes? No.
Well, it didn't matter anyways because the little punk decided he wanted to keep his smelly soaked jeans and underwear on.
Yeah - eww extreme.
Now my tears are sitting on my tear ducts awaiting the green light to flow and I bit down and asked the nurse if they have any spare clothes because:
I said bye quickly and yanked him out.
Finally got those jeans on him and because they didn't have any bags (that or I didn't actually ask because I was dying to leave) - we ran out and I carried his jeans that kept soaking themselves as I held them in my hands.
We caught the bus to downtown and then towards home and since he was falling asleep on the bus - I figured he could use a few extra minutes of nap time (he was up before 6am today) and I needed some ice-cream.
So we rambled past our usual bus stop and went to the grocery store where I knew Ben & Jerry's was on sale and I hummed and hawed over the peanut-butter cup or the Greek-style frozen yoghurt (strawberry shortcake) and opted for the latter.
Not that I think it's actually healthier for me - but because I know the sale ends on the 2nd of November and I will most definitely be back in time to get the peanut-butter ice-cream I left behind.
Once home, another tantrum began over the fact that he pottied (yay!) but refused to wash his hands (eww!) and my husband decided the corporal punishment would be not allowing him to wear underpants but a diaper instead like a baby.
After 45 minutes of screaming and crying for underwear, he's now wearing his underwear, his jeans are in the wash, I had a salad in anticipation of the fro-yo I plan on devouring once the tribe is asleep - and this blog post is complete.
Pray for me - if you want.
Love,
BIMU
PS I'll get my flu shot next week - when it's V-Man's turn for his yearly check-up and flu shot bonanza. Yeah - you should probably pray...and I'll load up on PB ice-cream. Thanks Ben & Jerry & City Market for the sale.
Perhaps it's going grocery shopping, walking around the second-hand store, going knitting (which usually involves a cookie for A-Man), grabbing a milk shake or some French fries...or cuddling at home.
Or - as fun as this sounds - going to your 3-year old check-up and getting the flu shot together.
Yeah I know - what a bucket of fun I am!
But! I tried to spice it up a bit!
The appointment was at 2pm which was a bit of an issue because nap-time at day-care is from 12-2pm.
So I picked him up at 12, and while his little friends were getting their snooze on - I busted him out of day-care and we went to the bus.
We went downtown and had McDonald's. We went to the fabric store to get me some solid cotton fabric (½-meters of 4 colours for my quilt and I plan to do some pinwheels for my next project!) which in all fairness - is also therapeutic shopping for me. I was predicting that the flu shot wouldn't go down well - and well...keep reading.
Then we took the bus to the Neuvola (children and maternal health clinic).
We got there in good spirits and I was thinking, "Holy f*ck! I might strike gold with this appointment - he's in SUCH a good mood!"
We had fifteen minutes to kill and he was very playful and showing off his little bus toy to another boy and girl there. He tried to interact with the boy - about his age - but the language barrier made it a bit tricky.
Well, we took advantage of this time and both used the bathroom, I weighed myself (blegh) and waited a bit.
Oh! Our turn!
So because he's 3 and because V-Man has autism and never had to have this kind of "special" appointment - I was excited!
Today we had a student nurse doing her practical training and our regular nurse wanted to see what A-Man can do.
Things to cover (things marked DD= didn't do - keep reading and you'll see why):
- Speech (DD - sorta)
- Understanding of simple tasks in Finnish and English (i.e. put the foam circles into their box according to red or yellow colour)
- Where's your nose/head/eyes? (DD)
- Open and close an empty plastic bottle with a small cap.
- Which is bigger/smaller (pictures in a book)? (DD)
- What is this (points to a photo) ? (DD)
There were of course questions about diet, sleep, attitude, tantrums and how things are going at home and in day-care.
And of course, because he's turned 3 and hasn't been to the Neuvola in a year - we had to get him measured. Height, weight and head circumference.
This is where the crap hit the fan.
It took over 20-minutes to get his measurements. We tried his weight on two different scales and since I had just weighed myself (gained about 5 pounds - blegh!) and was quickly getting frustrated - I scooped him up and stood on the scale and we did some basic math to figure out that he weighs approximately 15 kg.
Fastest way to lose 15 kg for me! HA!
The height? Holy smokes that was a pain in the arse too. They have this measuring tape that adjusts along one wall and you just pull it down to the top of the kid's head and ta-da. Done.
No - he absolutely refused and decided running around protesting and proving he can in fact speak by shouting, "NO! EI! (Finnish for "no") YOU - GO AWAY! GO AWAY!" loud and clear....
I tried to not laugh and I tried to be serious and the tears were pouring out of my eyes - I was both amused and embarrassed...
Eventually, we decided we'd treat him like a baby and lie him down on the measuring tool for - babies. That was about another 10-minutes of fighting and me having to toss my whole upper-body weight on top of him (good thing I got that extra 5 pounds...) to pin him down so the nurse and her pupil could guess he's about 90-something centimeters.
He spotted my phone and decided he wanted to watch Moomins and decided a screaming fit was in order.
"Oh no you don't!" I grab him, yank his jeans off quickly because he needs to get a flu shot in his thigh...
The student and I are wrestling/holding him down in my lap - and the nurse quickly goes in for the jab...
Awesome! We're done! Let's get the heck out of here!
Nope.
She wants to see if he'll put away the toys he took out and had organized into a straight line.
Nope - he doesn't want to. He wants his mother to put on Youtube on her pokey phone and play some Moomins.
I say nay-nay and he goes wild. Full blast screaming that's so high pitched, I'm curious if the windows are cracking and if he triggered some sort of silent alarm to the police...fat tears running down his face, redder than a tomato and why is he grabbing his crotch?
Why is he dripping?!
Oh no. Why the f*ck is he GUSHING from his - oh my f*ck.
He's piss-pouring himself. It's not even peeing, it's not even a wee.
It's down-pouring pee (piss-pouring - courtesy of yours truly) in and out of his pants.
How can a child - who peed before we left day-care and before we walked into the room thirty-five minutes ago HOLD SO MUCH IN HIS BLADDER?!
Do I have a diaper for him? No.
Do I have spare clothes for him? No.
Do we have a car, where I could plop him into a car seat or on a towel or blanket (which I normally would have in a car - for the dogs) and zoom back home quickly? No.
Do I have any doggy poo bags for his wet clothes? No.
Well, it didn't matter anyways because the little punk decided he wanted to keep his smelly soaked jeans and underwear on.
Yeah - eww extreme.
Now my tears are sitting on my tear ducts awaiting the green light to flow and I bit down and asked the nurse if they have any spare clothes because:
- A) I don't have extra clothes.
- B) We're going on a bus after and I doubt anyone would appreciate a urine-soaked child nearby.
I said bye quickly and yanked him out.
Finally got those jeans on him and because they didn't have any bags (that or I didn't actually ask because I was dying to leave) - we ran out and I carried his jeans that kept soaking themselves as I held them in my hands.
We caught the bus to downtown and then towards home and since he was falling asleep on the bus - I figured he could use a few extra minutes of nap time (he was up before 6am today) and I needed some ice-cream.
So we rambled past our usual bus stop and went to the grocery store where I knew Ben & Jerry's was on sale and I hummed and hawed over the peanut-butter cup or the Greek-style frozen yoghurt (strawberry shortcake) and opted for the latter.
Not that I think it's actually healthier for me - but because I know the sale ends on the 2nd of November and I will most definitely be back in time to get the peanut-butter ice-cream I left behind.
Once home, another tantrum began over the fact that he pottied (yay!) but refused to wash his hands (eww!) and my husband decided the corporal punishment would be not allowing him to wear underpants but a diaper instead like a baby.
After 45 minutes of screaming and crying for underwear, he's now wearing his underwear, his jeans are in the wash, I had a salad in anticipation of the fro-yo I plan on devouring once the tribe is asleep - and this blog post is complete.
Pray for me - if you want.
Love,
BIMU
PS I'll get my flu shot next week - when it's V-Man's turn for his yearly check-up and flu shot bonanza. Yeah - you should probably pray...and I'll load up on PB ice-cream. Thanks Ben & Jerry & City Market for the sale.
Sunday, 26 October 2014
Cooking With My Autistic Son
So now that it's pretty chilly out, the jogging with V-Man seem to be few and far between non existent.
A few nights ago, I tried a small accidental experiment with the V-Man. I was going to make hamburgers (with homemade buns too) but decided I was simply too tired and it would take far too long.
I'm at the final stage of fighting my cold and still a bit zapped of my regular crazy bursts of energy (which none of it gets used for cleaning magically...) and decided last minute on a switcheroo to Singapore vermicelli. Easy, budget-friendly and relatively light but filling.
While the meat and veggies were cooking, I started to mix up the sauce. I then noticed that someone snuck into the kitchen.
It was V-Man!
The reason why he has to sneak into the kitchen lately is because A-Man doesn't like him in the kitchen. A-Man is super territorial about the kitchen being his personal space to be creative with Mommy (me) but at times that's quite frustrating because I don't have enough hands to separate the two from beating the crap out of each other...or enough fingers to stuff into my ears as they cry and yell.
He seemed interested in what I was doing, which was both shocking and exciting.
So I took each spice shaker/jar and let him smell them. Lately, he's been very keen on smelling new food before trying them.
He let me hold the jars and after a deep sniff of each spice (i.e. curry powder, chili flakes, pepper, etc.) he would close the cap by pressing down on it then to let me know he was finished smelling - he pushed my hand away gently.
This is a huge improvement within itself as he used to shove everything away from him quite roughly too!
"Alright, what else can I get him to do?" - I thought out loud to myself.
Next thing I know, he's eyeing the stove and I know what you're thinking:
"Why the f would she let her kid near the stove? An autistic one at that?!"
But yeah, I did.
I pulled a chair up to the stove and he eagerly climbed aboard and took a look at the contents of the wok (pork & vegetables).
I showed him the spatula to stir the food with and he stood there just flapping and bouncing from his heels to his toes repeatedly out of sheer excitement.
He was happy. He wasn't screaming or crying - oh wait.
Then he decided to put his face near the wok and put his mouth on the side of it (like he was eating it)...well, he leaned back after I said firmly, "No." And continued to bop around on the chair.
I helped him to stir the meat and veggies and once the sauce was fully mixed, I took his hand and let him pour the sauce into the wok and stir a bit more.
He gave up on stirring after a couple of minutes and seemed quite pleased to look.
I tried talking to him and explaining what I was doing out loud to him and he listened for a bit then hopped off the chair and ran away to play.
Will I do this again?
Sure - why not? He had fun, he was learning something, he was able to do things (as little and insignificant as they may seem to you or I) - even for a short period of time and maybe it'll be a nice memory for him of cooking with his mother.
BIMU
A few nights ago, I tried a small accidental experiment with the V-Man. I was going to make hamburgers (with homemade buns too) but decided I was simply too tired and it would take far too long.
I'm at the final stage of fighting my cold and still a bit zapped of my regular crazy bursts of energy (which none of it gets used for cleaning magically...) and decided last minute on a switcheroo to Singapore vermicelli. Easy, budget-friendly and relatively light but filling.
While the meat and veggies were cooking, I started to mix up the sauce. I then noticed that someone snuck into the kitchen.
It was V-Man!
The reason why he has to sneak into the kitchen lately is because A-Man doesn't like him in the kitchen. A-Man is super territorial about the kitchen being his personal space to be creative with Mommy (me) but at times that's quite frustrating because I don't have enough hands to separate the two from beating the crap out of each other...or enough fingers to stuff into my ears as they cry and yell.
He seemed interested in what I was doing, which was both shocking and exciting.
So I took each spice shaker/jar and let him smell them. Lately, he's been very keen on smelling new food before trying them.
He let me hold the jars and after a deep sniff of each spice (i.e. curry powder, chili flakes, pepper, etc.) he would close the cap by pressing down on it then to let me know he was finished smelling - he pushed my hand away gently.
This is a huge improvement within itself as he used to shove everything away from him quite roughly too!
"Alright, what else can I get him to do?" - I thought out loud to myself.
Next thing I know, he's eyeing the stove and I know what you're thinking:
"Why the f would she let her kid near the stove? An autistic one at that?!"
But yeah, I did.
I pulled a chair up to the stove and he eagerly climbed aboard and took a look at the contents of the wok (pork & vegetables).
I showed him the spatula to stir the food with and he stood there just flapping and bouncing from his heels to his toes repeatedly out of sheer excitement.
He was happy. He wasn't screaming or crying - oh wait.
Then he decided to put his face near the wok and put his mouth on the side of it (like he was eating it)...well, he leaned back after I said firmly, "No." And continued to bop around on the chair.
I helped him to stir the meat and veggies and once the sauce was fully mixed, I took his hand and let him pour the sauce into the wok and stir a bit more.
He gave up on stirring after a couple of minutes and seemed quite pleased to look.
I tried talking to him and explaining what I was doing out loud to him and he listened for a bit then hopped off the chair and ran away to play.
Will I do this again?
Sure - why not? He had fun, he was learning something, he was able to do things (as little and insignificant as they may seem to you or I) - even for a short period of time and maybe it'll be a nice memory for him of cooking with his mother.
BIMU
Wednesday, 22 October 2014
Learning About Finland: "He's mentally retarded."
Ah - the lovely "R-word".
Retard.
Retarded.
Retardation.
A few months ago, I was downtown and got a phone call from a doctor at the hospital who informed me that I will get a notice in the mail regarding our following appointment for V-Man's diagnosis of autism.
Up until this past summer - he was only diagnosed as "having characteristics of autism" because they didn't know what level of severity it was or how it would develop in the future.
He was also two-years old when we started doing tests and having assessments at the hospital for him.
So right away it was clearly obvious that V-Man was autistic but how much - not yet sure.
Then this past summer, while I'm downtown waiting for the bus, carrying a baby and a crap-ton of groceries - I get a phone call from that doctor and this was our conversation pretty much:
What the F does that mean?!
So this was my response after a brief but noticeable pause:
"Okay." (I'm clearly learning the way of the Finns! HA.)
I was fighting back tears because I'm at a bus stop among strangers and not quite sure how to take this all in and the doctor was a bit surprised.
"You didn't know about this? I told your husband that this is a strong possibility...he didn't say anything?"
"Nope - not that I'm aware of."
So she confirms when the next appointment will be and that if I have any questions to feel free to call her.
As soon as I got home, I cried. I know it can be always worse - I know it and I preach it.
But it still was a shock and I didn't know how to react - so I cried.
Then I stuffed myself with the forbidden chips and ice-cream until the husband got home from work.
Then I quietly cooked a meal without so much as a peep.
When the kids were asleep then I opened my floodgates again and let SH have it.
In all fairness, in case he ever reads this - he defended himself with:
"Mental retardation just means that V-Man's delayed in learning - even basic everyday things. A developmental delay - which often goes with autism. We knew that. It's just a different way of saying it."
I went to the hospital for that meeting a month later and the doctor went over everything on her paper but her main focus was my face.
Not that I had a ginormous zit or anything - but moreso that I was so calm about the whole thing. (Remember - I did all my crying about a paragraph back/month prior! :) )
But once the words "Your son is showing signs of mental retardation..." - the translator stepped in and shockingly, corrected her.
Sure - medically - the term "retarded" is correct.
However, it didn't seem to appear that Finns are aware of the negative usage of the "R-Word".
The doctor was shocked, apologetic and made a mental note to not use the term "retarded" - so as to not offend other parents (probably ones who wouldn't be nearly as calm as I).
It's typical in North America as an example to ignorantly say, "You're retarded! That's so retarded! What a retard!"
I know - because I'm guilty of growing up hearing that (home, school, everywhere!) and saying that everywhere.
It was only until I got my first "professional" job at a bank did I kick that word out of my vocabulary. I developed a deep friendship with one of my very best friend's who has Cerebral Palsy and out of respect for her and the fact that it was very rude and hateful to use that word (in my opinion) anyways.
She's the first person I e-mailed and the first one with such a wise and calm response:
"Don't worry. Labels are for cans. Not people."
To have V-Man diagnosed with "Autism characteristics" - would never make me think of anyone referring to him as a "retard" - but rather as a kid who's acting weird and has autism.
But now that he has that diagnosis - I was upset. I sent e-mails and messages to my closest friends I felt comfortable telling and while all were Canadian - many were shocked at the doctor's "casual usage" of the words.
But she was right. It is a medical condition, it's her professional diagnosis and it's true.
He's far behind in his extremely basic developmental skills and with him not speaking - it's hard to say what he'll be like next year, in 5 years, in 10 or 20 years from now.
But we'll see how things go. :)
And for those who were wondering what's the latest and greatest hospital/doctor assessment update about the V-Man - well, this is it. :)
It doesn't make me love him any less - if anything - I love him a little more. I can't imagine the things that go through his mind and I consider him our little trooper because our other two children seem to not be showing any signs of autism or being mentally challenged in any way.
BIMU
PS I do have some friends that use the R-Word recreationally, so to speak, and no - I don't take offense to it when you use it. I haven't used it myself in such a long time - it's almost like hearing/reading a foreign language whenever someone does use it.
Nor am I intending for this post to offend anyone in any way.
Retard.
Retarded.
Retardation.
A few months ago, I was downtown and got a phone call from a doctor at the hospital who informed me that I will get a notice in the mail regarding our following appointment for V-Man's diagnosis of autism.
Up until this past summer - he was only diagnosed as "having characteristics of autism" because they didn't know what level of severity it was or how it would develop in the future.
He was also two-years old when we started doing tests and having assessments at the hospital for him.
So right away it was clearly obvious that V-Man was autistic but how much - not yet sure.
Then this past summer, while I'm downtown waiting for the bus, carrying a baby and a crap-ton of groceries - I get a phone call from that doctor and this was our conversation pretty much:
- "Hi, it's Doctor So and So. Is this a bad time to talk about V-Man's diagnosis?"
- "Nope - what is it?"
- "Well, he's definitely autistic and mentally retarded."
What the F does that mean?!
So this was my response after a brief but noticeable pause:
"Okay." (I'm clearly learning the way of the Finns! HA.)
I was fighting back tears because I'm at a bus stop among strangers and not quite sure how to take this all in and the doctor was a bit surprised.
"You didn't know about this? I told your husband that this is a strong possibility...he didn't say anything?"
"Nope - not that I'm aware of."
So she confirms when the next appointment will be and that if I have any questions to feel free to call her.
As soon as I got home, I cried. I know it can be always worse - I know it and I preach it.
But it still was a shock and I didn't know how to react - so I cried.
Then I stuffed myself with the forbidden chips and ice-cream until the husband got home from work.
Then I quietly cooked a meal without so much as a peep.
When the kids were asleep then I opened my floodgates again and let SH have it.
In all fairness, in case he ever reads this - he defended himself with:
"Mental retardation just means that V-Man's delayed in learning - even basic everyday things. A developmental delay - which often goes with autism. We knew that. It's just a different way of saying it."
I went to the hospital for that meeting a month later and the doctor went over everything on her paper but her main focus was my face.
Not that I had a ginormous zit or anything - but moreso that I was so calm about the whole thing. (Remember - I did all my crying about a paragraph back/month prior! :) )
But once the words "Your son is showing signs of mental retardation..." - the translator stepped in and shockingly, corrected her.
Sure - medically - the term "retarded" is correct.
However, it didn't seem to appear that Finns are aware of the negative usage of the "R-Word".
The doctor was shocked, apologetic and made a mental note to not use the term "retarded" - so as to not offend other parents (probably ones who wouldn't be nearly as calm as I).
It's typical in North America as an example to ignorantly say, "You're retarded! That's so retarded! What a retard!"
I know - because I'm guilty of growing up hearing that (home, school, everywhere!) and saying that everywhere.
It was only until I got my first "professional" job at a bank did I kick that word out of my vocabulary. I developed a deep friendship with one of my very best friend's who has Cerebral Palsy and out of respect for her and the fact that it was very rude and hateful to use that word (in my opinion) anyways.
She's the first person I e-mailed and the first one with such a wise and calm response:
"Don't worry. Labels are for cans. Not people."
To have V-Man diagnosed with "Autism characteristics" - would never make me think of anyone referring to him as a "retard" - but rather as a kid who's acting weird and has autism.
But now that he has that diagnosis - I was upset. I sent e-mails and messages to my closest friends I felt comfortable telling and while all were Canadian - many were shocked at the doctor's "casual usage" of the words.
But she was right. It is a medical condition, it's her professional diagnosis and it's true.
He's far behind in his extremely basic developmental skills and with him not speaking - it's hard to say what he'll be like next year, in 5 years, in 10 or 20 years from now.
But we'll see how things go. :)
And for those who were wondering what's the latest and greatest hospital/doctor assessment update about the V-Man - well, this is it. :)
It doesn't make me love him any less - if anything - I love him a little more. I can't imagine the things that go through his mind and I consider him our little trooper because our other two children seem to not be showing any signs of autism or being mentally challenged in any way.
BIMU
PS I do have some friends that use the R-Word recreationally, so to speak, and no - I don't take offense to it when you use it. I haven't used it myself in such a long time - it's almost like hearing/reading a foreign language whenever someone does use it.
Nor am I intending for this post to offend anyone in any way.
Tuesday, 21 October 2014
Learning About Finland: Baby Showers Are Few & Far Between
The term "Baby Shower" does not actually refer to the washing of the child or the tears...nope, not even the golden shower you might get occasionally (typical with boys) or the brown/green/black/mustard coloured splatter either.
In North America, a baby shower is the chance to shower the un-born baby and quite pregnant (or expecting - aka adopting or other alternative) mother with gifts, love, food and attention.
Usually the work place, Church, close friends and/or family would host one and quite often it's a surprise.
There's usually light finger foods, some games, prizes, sharing of birth stories or advice (especially for the first-time mothers) and that's that.
In Finland - it doesn't quite exist yet...
If you're an expat and living in Finland - don't be surprised if you don't get thrown a lovely gathering of friends, a pile of gifts and a stuffed tummy of food before your up-coming due date.
It's just coming to Finland in bits and pieces and typically most Finns don't name their child until they've met the baby and decide on a date for a "Naming Party" (often tied in with a christening or baptism).
That seems to be the prime time to meet the baby, congratulate the parents and the older siblings and bring a gift.
The only baby showers I have been to in Finland have been organized for those that are expats or know about baby showers because they have lots of expat friends or they're half Finnish.
Finnish men seem to have something called a "Little Toes Party" which involves getting dragged out and completely wasted for their "last time".
Today, my knitting group and I threw a triple baby shower.
Oh yeah - we went there. We have three ladies all pregnant (okay one had her baby last month) and all in agreement to having one baby shower together.
We picked a date, decided on potluck and trickily thought of three different gifts to get each expectant mother that would (hopefully) compliment her taste and style.
Oh yeah, and all three ladies were having boys.
We had the party at the mother who had her baby boy about a month ago's home and it was spacious, welcoming and it gave most of us a chance to see her new home. :)
Each of us brought a dish of food of some sort to share and we started with food because with all the wonderful smells coming from the kitchen/living room (it's connected) - it's hard not to resist on snacking here and there!
Once the food was done, we played some games.
We had a baby food tasting game (4 baby food jars with the labels removed and you had to guess what was in them by looks, smells and taste if you wished), memory game (20 items related to baby or child and after 5-minutes - you had to write down what you remembered) and charades.
Charades is a game where you draw a word or sentence and have to act it out silently so the others (or your team if the group is divided) can guess what you're trying to portray.
Funny enough, one of the expecting mothers drew the word "Delivery" and she got really into it, dropped down on the floor and imitated giving birth!!
I've never seen this done at a baby shower before but it was really funny and a hit (I think). Definitely recommended!
For gifts I just ran into the grocery store and picked up random small sized chocolate or candy bars. Simple and lots of variety for people to choose from. :)
Because we're a crafting group, it made sense to make/find gifts for the mothers that were unique to them.
Actually, you can check them out here in her Etsy shop - along with lots of other fantastic things like post cards, folded cards, calendars and the like!
Mostly dog-themed ;).
Then we had dessert and chit chat around the table!!
Fairly relaxed and some of us managed to get a bit of knitting done too.
I'll write a separate blog post about ideas for baby showers and how to go about setting it up!
Until next time!
BIMU
In North America, a baby shower is the chance to shower the un-born baby and quite pregnant (or expecting - aka adopting or other alternative) mother with gifts, love, food and attention.
Usually the work place, Church, close friends and/or family would host one and quite often it's a surprise.
There's usually light finger foods, some games, prizes, sharing of birth stories or advice (especially for the first-time mothers) and that's that.
In Finland - it doesn't quite exist yet...
If you're an expat and living in Finland - don't be surprised if you don't get thrown a lovely gathering of friends, a pile of gifts and a stuffed tummy of food before your up-coming due date.
It's just coming to Finland in bits and pieces and typically most Finns don't name their child until they've met the baby and decide on a date for a "Naming Party" (often tied in with a christening or baptism).
That seems to be the prime time to meet the baby, congratulate the parents and the older siblings and bring a gift.
The only baby showers I have been to in Finland have been organized for those that are expats or know about baby showers because they have lots of expat friends or they're half Finnish.
Finnish men seem to have something called a "Little Toes Party" which involves getting dragged out and completely wasted for their "last time".
Today, my knitting group and I threw a triple baby shower.
Oh yeah - we went there. We have three ladies all pregnant (okay one had her baby last month) and all in agreement to having one baby shower together.
We picked a date, decided on potluck and trickily thought of three different gifts to get each expectant mother that would (hopefully) compliment her taste and style.
Oh yeah, and all three ladies were having boys.
We had the party at the mother who had her baby boy about a month ago's home and it was spacious, welcoming and it gave most of us a chance to see her new home. :)
Each of us brought a dish of food of some sort to share and we started with food because with all the wonderful smells coming from the kitchen/living room (it's connected) - it's hard not to resist on snacking here and there!
Once the food was done, we played some games.
We had a baby food tasting game (4 baby food jars with the labels removed and you had to guess what was in them by looks, smells and taste if you wished), memory game (20 items related to baby or child and after 5-minutes - you had to write down what you remembered) and charades.
Charades is a game where you draw a word or sentence and have to act it out silently so the others (or your team if the group is divided) can guess what you're trying to portray.
Funny enough, one of the expecting mothers drew the word "Delivery" and she got really into it, dropped down on the floor and imitated giving birth!!
I've never seen this done at a baby shower before but it was really funny and a hit (I think). Definitely recommended!
For gifts I just ran into the grocery store and picked up random small sized chocolate or candy bars. Simple and lots of variety for people to choose from. :)
Because we're a crafting group, it made sense to make/find gifts for the mothers that were unique to them.
- For the one who had the baby already - we each crocheted or knitted a square and shortened his name to 3 letters and knitted that into 3 squares and he now has a personalized blanket.
- For the one who technically lives in another city now and had to take the train back in a couple days - we didn't want to laden her down with a lot of heavy stuff and she had 2 simple requests. Nothing blue and hooded towels.
- So we got terry cloth fabric, two of the ladies made 1 towel and some wash cloths to match.
- We also each bought some cotton yarn, as she's a crochet fanatic and it was all wrapped up in the shape of a pram for her. And a little notebook to write patterns down too.
- The third was the trickiest. We knew she has a nephew in her native country and a nephew here in Finland from her husband's side - so clothing was obviously not necessary. That and she's a knitting machine (and regularly designs her own patterns) and quickly becoming a sewing machine too.
- Ideas we had for her (that were quickly cancelled because she ended up receiving/buying or making them herself:
- Baby carrier
- Pram
- Scrapbook or baby record book
- We then decided on something she could never predict - nor her mother in-law or mother! A little library for the baby. We each brought our favourite childhood stories and the baby and parents will have loads to read in both Finnish and English. :)
Actually, you can check them out here in her Etsy shop - along with lots of other fantastic things like post cards, folded cards, calendars and the like!
Mostly dog-themed ;).
Then we had dessert and chit chat around the table!!
Fairly relaxed and some of us managed to get a bit of knitting done too.
I'll write a separate blog post about ideas for baby showers and how to go about setting it up!
Until next time!
BIMU
Monday, 20 October 2014
Life With Kids: Why I Shop Second-Hand
I figured I'd start a chapter in my blog (which will have it's own tag line on the side under "The Common Ones") about "Life With Kids" - to help those interested in kid-friendly/specific posts.
So! Shopping second-hand.
BIMU
PS Here's a handy link for those in Finland! It's a site with a list of all the kirpputori (second-hand shops) around your city.
So! Shopping second-hand.
I LOVE IT.
In Canada, second-hand shopping is okay at Value Village and online and lately, through volunteer-run Facebook pages based on the area you live in.
Oh and fleamarkets or garage sales are still super popular.
Coming to Finland five years ago - we bought a lot of stuff for the V-Man from H&M because I didn't know my way around the city, didn't know of the fabulous second-hand stores that are scattered around the city and my Finnish language skills simply did not exist.
H&M has sales regularly and after a year and a half - I discovered a second-hand shop that was a 15-minutes walk from home. Perfect!
So, I understand that shopping second-hand for things isn't everyone's cup of tea but rest assured, in Scandinavia - it's totally acceptable and fine!
What do I look for?
- Clothes/footwear: for myself, the kids and rarely for the husband (although I did find him like-new dressy Ecco winter boots the other day for a fab price!) because he doesn't care for used clothing.
- Cloth diapers - as long as they're not terribly stained - why not?!
- Movies: Now that we have 3 children, date nights to the movie theater are slim to none and that's alright because everything comes out to DVD or bluray eventually!
- Glass animal figurines: I collect miniature glass animals and because it's a dying art - they're hard to find!
- Moomin mugs: Again, I collect.
- Kitchen utensils: We got a huge box of dishes when we moved from a friend - so I just keep an eye for little things like baking utensils, pans and so on. (I'm not allowed buying anymore "machines" because I now own a food processor/mixer, a blender, a bread-making machine, a juicer and a deep-fryer - all second--hand!)
- Lunch containers: I love taking the kids to the playground in the summer and bringing snacks/lunch with us - because it's healthier, cheaper and convenient for me to have food on hand at all times too! Plus I'm hoping to go back to school too myself - so I love bringing lunch with me.
- Stuff for the dogs: Because they're family too! :)
But WHY second-hand shop?
- Save money: If the price is right - you can save quite a lot. Whether it be on something not available in Finland and someone who has travelled bought the item abroad or online - you'd be saving on transport or shipping fees and hopefully off of the original price.
- Help the environment: Yep - this is one that I like a lot! I can bring my own bags to the second-hand store for one - so I don't have to be issued a plastic bag! Also, if the item you buy isn't still in its original packaging - then that's less waste for you to toss out!
- Charity or finance a person/family: Many of the second-hand shops in Finland are ran by a team of people but the table you purchase from is being rented from someone getting rid of their junk/stuff. So the seller rents the table for X amount of weeks but the prices on the tags are usually for an individual and the money goes straight back to them.
Also, there are charity shops - so the prices you see - is the money that goes straight to charity. - Growing like weeds: Children grow in a blink of an eye so I see no point in paying a ridiculous amount of money for clothing that they're not going to wear for a very long time. Foot wear especially!
- I'm a collector: Original prices on things and items that are no longer produced can add up! So if I happen to find a Moomin mug cheaper than in the shops in excellent condition or a glass mini animal figurine - then I'm happy to add to my collection.
BIMU
PS Here's a handy link for those in Finland! It's a site with a list of all the kirpputori (second-hand shops) around your city.
Friday, 17 October 2014
"Fine Dining" with my kids
So my kids are almost 5 and almost 3-years old and almost 9-months old.
We have a birthday party planned and I'll send the boys to their day-cares with something sugar, lactose and gluten-free (probably a fruit salad and some crackers for V-Man and banana muffins for A-Man) on their respective days.
V-Man is currently at overnight care and while the A-Man's big 0-3 is next week, we thought it would be nice to go and take him out for dinner.
Something that is NOT McDonald's or Hesburger. He had a meal out during this autumn break - and today he went to a Thai buffet restaurant with me for lunch and did pretty well there.
At home he doesn't always eat what is put in front of him so I thought maybe bumping it up and taking him to dinner could be fun and enjoyable.
But SH pointed out that if we went to anywhere else - there would be a waiting period.
V-Man doesn't do "waiting for food" very well.
There's running away, jumping and climbing - he's introduced himself and spread some autism awareness via climbing along the head of booth-style seating...yeah that was fun.
There's hand and arm flapping, there's screaming and moaning/groaning.
There's frustration as we wait sometimes 5 to 30 minutes for food.
And that's why we decided we'll take A-Man out for a special/early birthday dinner tomorrow night to American Diner.
It has food he likes and they have children meals. And those children meals also come in an awesome cardboard-shaped car!
It's not that V-Man doesn't deserve to come out with us for dinner. It's just a lot less stressful for everyone (especially him) if he's doing something he likes, eating food when he's used to and where he's used to - than to drag him into what could be an extremely uncomfortable situation for him.
So on his actual birthday next week, I'll bake him a cake. And we'll celebrate together with V-Man and in the privacy of our own home.
I realize this totally makes me look like we're playing favourites and so on but we're really not. We just want A-Man to have a nice dinner out with us (M-Girl will probably be present too) that is slightly upscale for a 3-year old and give him the chance to be the total center of attention.
For V-Man's birthday - we're going to take the whole family to see his favourite band that's visiting. He's going to be so thrilled and hopefully exhausted after from all the jumping and dancing that's bound to happen.
Dinner is also a possibility - but it'll probably be some sort of pizza buffet or McDonald's.
And I think he'll be tickled pink about that.
And let's be honest, while I'm at it, my kids don't quite get birthdays or Christmas. They don't know who Santa, the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy are and they don't know their own ages, let alone why turning 1-year older is being celebrated.
And that's both of my boys! It's not that we don't do anything - they just look extremely confused during birthday parties and A-Man enjoys opening presents but still doesn't know why. Christmas holidays just mean that for some strange reason, there's no day-care, it's still dark and we have some decorations (when we remember).
Perhaps it could also be because of the double languages - when they're older they'll figure it out and then I'm sure I'll be writing about how my kids want this and that and started their letter/list to Santa on January 1st. :)
BIMU
We have a birthday party planned and I'll send the boys to their day-cares with something sugar, lactose and gluten-free (probably a fruit salad and some crackers for V-Man and banana muffins for A-Man) on their respective days.
V-Man is currently at overnight care and while the A-Man's big 0-3 is next week, we thought it would be nice to go and take him out for dinner.
Something that is NOT McDonald's or Hesburger. He had a meal out during this autumn break - and today he went to a Thai buffet restaurant with me for lunch and did pretty well there.
At home he doesn't always eat what is put in front of him so I thought maybe bumping it up and taking him to dinner could be fun and enjoyable.
But SH pointed out that if we went to anywhere else - there would be a waiting period.
V-Man doesn't do "waiting for food" very well.
There's running away, jumping and climbing - he's introduced himself and spread some autism awareness via climbing along the head of booth-style seating...yeah that was fun.
There's hand and arm flapping, there's screaming and moaning/groaning.
There's frustration as we wait sometimes 5 to 30 minutes for food.
And that's why we decided we'll take A-Man out for a special/early birthday dinner tomorrow night to American Diner.
It has food he likes and they have children meals. And those children meals also come in an awesome cardboard-shaped car!
It's not that V-Man doesn't deserve to come out with us for dinner. It's just a lot less stressful for everyone (especially him) if he's doing something he likes, eating food when he's used to and where he's used to - than to drag him into what could be an extremely uncomfortable situation for him.
So on his actual birthday next week, I'll bake him a cake. And we'll celebrate together with V-Man and in the privacy of our own home.
I realize this totally makes me look like we're playing favourites and so on but we're really not. We just want A-Man to have a nice dinner out with us (M-Girl will probably be present too) that is slightly upscale for a 3-year old and give him the chance to be the total center of attention.
For V-Man's birthday - we're going to take the whole family to see his favourite band that's visiting. He's going to be so thrilled and hopefully exhausted after from all the jumping and dancing that's bound to happen.
Dinner is also a possibility - but it'll probably be some sort of pizza buffet or McDonald's.
And I think he'll be tickled pink about that.
And let's be honest, while I'm at it, my kids don't quite get birthdays or Christmas. They don't know who Santa, the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy are and they don't know their own ages, let alone why turning 1-year older is being celebrated.
And that's both of my boys! It's not that we don't do anything - they just look extremely confused during birthday parties and A-Man enjoys opening presents but still doesn't know why. Christmas holidays just mean that for some strange reason, there's no day-care, it's still dark and we have some decorations (when we remember).
Perhaps it could also be because of the double languages - when they're older they'll figure it out and then I'm sure I'll be writing about how my kids want this and that and started their letter/list to Santa on January 1st. :)
BIMU
Tuesday, 14 October 2014
My First Chicken Pot Pie = Success!
I love chicken pot pie and I'm totally fine with the little frozen ones in their tiny cute little tin foil pans...they're usually Swanson branded in Canada at least and found in the frozen section.
Personal-sized portions, toss in the hot oven for awhile and you have yourself a pot pie without all of the work.
But I'm quickly learning that home-made is so much tastier if I have the time and can plan ahead!!
If you follow me on Instagram (*cough cough - it'd be great if you did!) - you'll see that I post photos about food pretty much on a daily basis.
Anyway, something I just had a crazy craving for today was chicken pot pie.
Actually with the cold and dreary weather lately - any kind of pot pie is welcome!!
So I began to look up recipes online last night. I didn't want to have to go the grocery store if I didn't have to and I remembered having a couple pieces of thigh/drumsticks in the freezer that could be used up.
So when I woke up at 7:30 (yay kids) this morning, I immediately boiled a kettle of water, tossed:
I prepped the crust dough and wrapped in plastic wrap - tossed that in the fridge.
Then I decided I wanted it to have some flavour - so I tossed in a couple frozen sweet Italian sausages from Craig Beckley. After about a total of 4 hours - the meats were cooked and I had a broth ready to use for the pot pie!
In a pot on the stove, I put some extra virgin olive oil (should've used butter but oh well!) and added:
I also removed the sausage from the casing (made a cut down the length and be careful because it may squirt grease!) and crumbled that up.
Both meats went into the pot on the stove.
Also I rolled the pie crust dough out as thinly and big as possible because I was using a rectangular glass dish.
I had turned my oven on to 200*C...
I stirred it around quite a bit on medium-high temperature and then added some flour. It wasn't all-purpose or bread flour but some sort of gluten-free Italian stuff I got ages ago...but regular flour is fine too!
I stirred it and then added 2 cups (2 Moomin mugs .8dl) of the broth from the slow cooker.
It was looking alright but I thought it could be a bit thicker...and of course baking in the oven will thicken it too!
But I saw some people recommended cream of mushroom soup or cooking cream.
Since I didn't have either and my husband doesn't like mushrooms - I opted for Greek yoghurt. 2 big blobs of it (blob - more than a heaping tablespoon :) ) and stirred it altogether.
For spices - I used:
I poured that lot from the stove into my glass dish (my oven was heated up and ready to go!) and covered the mixture with the pie dough.
I just stuffed the edges into the glass dish - trying to not burn my fingers and used a sharp paring knife to cut some slits into the top (so it doesn't explode in my oven) and 45 minutes later - had chicken pot pie.
I think next time - I'll add an egg wash or brush the top with melted butter (I forgot) and perhaps 30-35 minutes will be better and the crust won't be SO golden brown...it could've been a bit flakier but still - I'm not complaining!
And the fact that SH liked it, ate two decent sized portions and said it was alright enough for me to make again in the future - REALLY happy!
I haven't had pot pie in the last 5 years that I've lived in Finland and I'm just tickled pink that I successfully made one by myself!
BIMU
PS I'll update with photos next time I make it or just check out my Instagram! :)
Personal-sized portions, toss in the hot oven for awhile and you have yourself a pot pie without all of the work.
But I'm quickly learning that home-made is so much tastier if I have the time and can plan ahead!!
If you follow me on Instagram (*cough cough - it'd be great if you did!) - you'll see that I post photos about food pretty much on a daily basis.
Anyway, something I just had a crazy craving for today was chicken pot pie.
Actually with the cold and dreary weather lately - any kind of pot pie is welcome!!
So I began to look up recipes online last night. I didn't want to have to go the grocery store if I didn't have to and I remembered having a couple pieces of thigh/drumsticks in the freezer that could be used up.
So when I woke up at 7:30 (yay kids) this morning, I immediately boiled a kettle of water, tossed:
- 1 vegetable bouillon jelly blob
- 1 herbs bouillon jelly blob
- 1 chicken bouillon jelly blob
I prepped the crust dough and wrapped in plastic wrap - tossed that in the fridge.
Then I decided I wanted it to have some flavour - so I tossed in a couple frozen sweet Italian sausages from Craig Beckley. After about a total of 4 hours - the meats were cooked and I had a broth ready to use for the pot pie!
In a pot on the stove, I put some extra virgin olive oil (should've used butter but oh well!) and added:
- ½ medium peeled and chopped finely onion
- 1 carrot peeled and finely chopped (I would've added more but apparently ran out.)
- 1 medium potato peeled and chopped up into small bite-sized pieces.
- Couple handfuls of frozen green beans.
- Some frozen peas (added the frozen veg near the end)
I also removed the sausage from the casing (made a cut down the length and be careful because it may squirt grease!) and crumbled that up.
Both meats went into the pot on the stove.
Also I rolled the pie crust dough out as thinly and big as possible because I was using a rectangular glass dish.
I had turned my oven on to 200*C...
I stirred it around quite a bit on medium-high temperature and then added some flour. It wasn't all-purpose or bread flour but some sort of gluten-free Italian stuff I got ages ago...but regular flour is fine too!
I stirred it and then added 2 cups (2 Moomin mugs .8dl) of the broth from the slow cooker.
It was looking alright but I thought it could be a bit thicker...and of course baking in the oven will thicken it too!
But I saw some people recommended cream of mushroom soup or cooking cream.
Since I didn't have either and my husband doesn't like mushrooms - I opted for Greek yoghurt. 2 big blobs of it (blob - more than a heaping tablespoon :) ) and stirred it altogether.
For spices - I used:
- dried parsley
- pepper mix
- Chicken & Steak spice mix
- Rosemary
- pinch of salt
I poured that lot from the stove into my glass dish (my oven was heated up and ready to go!) and covered the mixture with the pie dough.
I just stuffed the edges into the glass dish - trying to not burn my fingers and used a sharp paring knife to cut some slits into the top (so it doesn't explode in my oven) and 45 minutes later - had chicken pot pie.
I think next time - I'll add an egg wash or brush the top with melted butter (I forgot) and perhaps 30-35 minutes will be better and the crust won't be SO golden brown...it could've been a bit flakier but still - I'm not complaining!
And the fact that SH liked it, ate two decent sized portions and said it was alright enough for me to make again in the future - REALLY happy!
I haven't had pot pie in the last 5 years that I've lived in Finland and I'm just tickled pink that I successfully made one by myself!
BIMU
PS I'll update with photos next time I make it or just check out my Instagram! :)
Saturday, 11 October 2014
Raising Autism Awareness: The Birthday Party Edition
I went to a child birthday party today of a friend's (as mentioned in my exciting post regarding gift shopping), and I originally planned that the whole family was going.
Yup, me +4.
A year ago, it would be automatically assumed that V-Man wouldn't go -not that he doesn't deserve to -but because it was a constant fight. Fight to get him dressed. Fight to get him out the door and to the bus on time (with minimal wait time and absolutely no rushing). Fight to get the stroller up the hill with him in it (as walking is fairly new). Fight to make sure he didn't feel up any other adult guests (I.e. bum grabbing). Fight to entertain him without a screaming fit.
Fight to get him dressed again to go home.
Now, he doesn't fight so much on those things above but is still quite fussy if we have to wait for the bus.
So my original plan was shattered this morning with SH telling me he's not able to go because he has a sore throat.
Fair enough. I don't want him to spread whatever that may be to others and he looked so miserable, I offered to take 2 kids.
The agreement was that M-Girl would come with me if she wasn't asleep when it was time to go, and V-Man.
I'd prefer A-Man because he loves to wait for the bus and watch traffic. So if we missed a bus, not a big tantrum to deal with.
That and he could use more friends, practice speaking and have some fun.
Of course, he decided a tantrum and a nap while I was getting ready, was the best idea and I'm not going to wake up a just fallen asleep child!!
So V-Man and M-Girl it was.
I strapped on my baby carrier, plopped her into it, put the harness on V-Man and off we went.
We arrived at the bus stop ten minutes too early. So we walked in the rain to the next stop, caught the bus and headed downtown. Minimal fighting from him...ok, I can do this!
I ended up getting some pajamas for the birthday boy -to go with the book- and during me paying, V-Man decided to try and make a mad dash.
I seriously think my legs may have grown, because I stretched out like an ostrich and caught him by his harness strap. Pressed that green button, took my bag and off we went!
We walked to the party, and silly me, took the longer route because I forgot the quicker way.
V-Man was pissed. It was maybe a 15-minutes walk, as opposed to 6?
My bad.
We got there as other guests were arriving and I didn't know anyone else but the hostess and her sister. A couple friends showed up bit later, so that was nice.
Then my personal party began.
He knows food and loves it. He's familiar with a kitchen and is pretty determined (code- stubborn).
My M-Girl opted for screaming at the birthday boy and V-Man decided a whole bowl of cookies should satisfy him, while other children played.
No, he didn't eat the whole thing but was quite protective of it and territorial like a dog with a steak.
I'm torn between two places and once the hostess announced that the food was available, I got him a plate of food to share with his sister.
While I'm doing that, he's in the grandma's seat, chowing down her food.
I'm embarrassed and while she reassures me it's all good, I know the other parents are wondering why a big kid is not listening, hasn't said a word but made funny sounds and is eating grandma's food.
I think I heard someone explain and just kept going...
Got him settled with a plate of food and a drink and things are going well. He runs off to play and comes back half naked. Ok, just shirtless but working on removing the sweat pants.
Is that poop I smell?!
After chasing him down and doing a diaper change, I'm exhausted. Well, we lasted 1.5 hours....not too bad!!!!
I took a few photos of the cake and began to get him dressed to leave. It's not that the party wasn't lovely, because it was!!!
I just wasn't enjoying myself and watching/entertaining him is a 2-person job. Never mind watching the baby or trying to introduce myself to anyone!
It's also why we don't bring him to outdoor parties because he's an escape artist and a very fast one at that.
I think in the future, he'll stay at home...it's just a bit easier.
Not that we don't want people to learn about autism or ask questions and we're not ashamed of him either. I think we need to figure out how to get him to entertain himself without disturbing others and for longer than 2 minutes stretches at a time! Especially if it's a party that involves games, or if waiting for food is required!
In retrospect, I should've played some YouTube videos on my phone. But the touch screen is sensitive and he would've drove me wild with exiting it repeatedly.
Oh well, until next time!!!
BIMU
Yup, me +4.
A year ago, it would be automatically assumed that V-Man wouldn't go -not that he doesn't deserve to -but because it was a constant fight. Fight to get him dressed. Fight to get him out the door and to the bus on time (with minimal wait time and absolutely no rushing). Fight to get the stroller up the hill with him in it (as walking is fairly new). Fight to make sure he didn't feel up any other adult guests (I.e. bum grabbing). Fight to entertain him without a screaming fit.
Fight to get him dressed again to go home.
Now, he doesn't fight so much on those things above but is still quite fussy if we have to wait for the bus.
So my original plan was shattered this morning with SH telling me he's not able to go because he has a sore throat.
Fair enough. I don't want him to spread whatever that may be to others and he looked so miserable, I offered to take 2 kids.
The agreement was that M-Girl would come with me if she wasn't asleep when it was time to go, and V-Man.
I'd prefer A-Man because he loves to wait for the bus and watch traffic. So if we missed a bus, not a big tantrum to deal with.
That and he could use more friends, practice speaking and have some fun.
Of course, he decided a tantrum and a nap while I was getting ready, was the best idea and I'm not going to wake up a just fallen asleep child!!
So V-Man and M-Girl it was.
I strapped on my baby carrier, plopped her into it, put the harness on V-Man and off we went.
We arrived at the bus stop ten minutes too early. So we walked in the rain to the next stop, caught the bus and headed downtown. Minimal fighting from him...ok, I can do this!
I ended up getting some pajamas for the birthday boy -to go with the book- and during me paying, V-Man decided to try and make a mad dash.
I seriously think my legs may have grown, because I stretched out like an ostrich and caught him by his harness strap. Pressed that green button, took my bag and off we went!
We walked to the party, and silly me, took the longer route because I forgot the quicker way.
V-Man was pissed. It was maybe a 15-minutes walk, as opposed to 6?
My bad.
We got there as other guests were arriving and I didn't know anyone else but the hostess and her sister. A couple friends showed up bit later, so that was nice.
Then my personal party began.
He knows food and loves it. He's familiar with a kitchen and is pretty determined (code- stubborn).
My M-Girl opted for screaming at the birthday boy and V-Man decided a whole bowl of cookies should satisfy him, while other children played.
No, he didn't eat the whole thing but was quite protective of it and territorial like a dog with a steak.
I'm torn between two places and once the hostess announced that the food was available, I got him a plate of food to share with his sister.
While I'm doing that, he's in the grandma's seat, chowing down her food.
I'm embarrassed and while she reassures me it's all good, I know the other parents are wondering why a big kid is not listening, hasn't said a word but made funny sounds and is eating grandma's food.
I think I heard someone explain and just kept going...
Got him settled with a plate of food and a drink and things are going well. He runs off to play and comes back half naked. Ok, just shirtless but working on removing the sweat pants.
Is that poop I smell?!
After chasing him down and doing a diaper change, I'm exhausted. Well, we lasted 1.5 hours....not too bad!!!!
I took a few photos of the cake and began to get him dressed to leave. It's not that the party wasn't lovely, because it was!!!
I just wasn't enjoying myself and watching/entertaining him is a 2-person job. Never mind watching the baby or trying to introduce myself to anyone!
It's also why we don't bring him to outdoor parties because he's an escape artist and a very fast one at that.
I think in the future, he'll stay at home...it's just a bit easier.
Not that we don't want people to learn about autism or ask questions and we're not ashamed of him either. I think we need to figure out how to get him to entertain himself without disturbing others and for longer than 2 minutes stretches at a time! Especially if it's a party that involves games, or if waiting for food is required!
In retrospect, I should've played some YouTube videos on my phone. But the touch screen is sensitive and he would've drove me wild with exiting it repeatedly.
Oh well, until next time!!!
BIMU
The Birthday Gift That Involved The Police
Yesterday I decided to bring A-Man with me to go birthday gift shopping for a party we're attending today.
The theme was "woodland animals". I was stuck and had never met the child while he was awake for very long (he's turning 1) and not in a long time because they were abroad for awhile.
I figured I'd get some fabric and make a blanket and get a book. Well, I didn't like anything in the fabric shop - so A-Man and I kept trucking.
Then I figured at least a book would be nice and if I have time to whip up something - I'll try!
While shopping for books (and discovering this fantastic one about intarsia - I'm a total newbie at knitting with multiple colours), A-Man disappeared.
I occasionally called his name out and he would come to me to check in, but when he didn't do that, I got concerned.
I paid for my stuff upstairs, circled both floors three times and even checked the elevator.
No A-Man.
"HE'S GONE!!!" - My frantic text to the spouse...
(No response).
Then running back upstairs, realized the front doors are automatic.
I ran out and looked around and thought quickly where he would go by himself, that he knows.
A) Hesburger -across from me
B) McDonalds -opposite direction
C) Mestarin Herkku - a grocery store beneath Sokos -also across from me
D) The bus stop - down the hill
What direction am I supposed to f*cking go?!
Then I see the police!!
Hmm, ask them for help in finding my kid and perhaps have them think I'm a crappy mother OR - keep looking for him on my own...OR suck it up and ask them for help anyway?
Then I see him. I see his little dark grey hat covered in colourful bugs, his beige puffy vest and his tear-streaked face...and all the panic I have whooshes out of me.
He's sitting on the police officer's lap in the paddy-wagon that I'm staring down.
I rub my eyes and squint again and the police van is slowly cruising by because it's a pedestrian-only street and I run over to the van and wave to the passenger-side police officer.
He looks over at me and clearly my 2-year old recognizes me and starts bouncing wildly in the guys' lap.
They open the door and A-Man is screaming, "ÄITI!!!" (Mom in Finnish) and clinging to my neck...I'm crying and thanking the police officer and as they drive away, my 2-year old decides he must shove me aside and wave good-bye to his friends.
Yep - and scream, "HEI HEI!" (bye-bye) to his new BFFs.
Repeatedly...for a solid 10 seconds...
And of course everyone is already curious why this expat-lookin' lady ran up to a police van and how she could (obviously) possibly lose her child...
So once they saw A-Man, snot-running, tears drying toddler wave and scream good-bye to the police...there were lots of smiles and chuckles.
"Got him!" - my text to the spouse.
(No response.)
How far did he get?!
No idea - I forgot to ask. It was about 15-20 minutes of his being lost - I was just happy he was back in my arms.
And I'm also glad he didn't take anything from the book store on the way out or pee on the officer's lap.
We went straight home from there and my face is all puffy from crying and embarrassment and when we walk in the door, SH looks at me and I asked him, "Did you get my messages?"
I'd like to think I used my calm as death voice...the scarier than screaming voice...
"Nooo....um why? What happened?" - he goes to find it...it was in a coat pocket, in the closet with the door shut.
"What do you mean he went missing?"
After a repeat of what happened, he tries to not laugh. Then he says (semi) proudly,
"Never thought he'd be in a cop car this young, huh?"
Seriously?!
BIMU
The theme was "woodland animals". I was stuck and had never met the child while he was awake for very long (he's turning 1) and not in a long time because they were abroad for awhile.
I figured I'd get some fabric and make a blanket and get a book. Well, I didn't like anything in the fabric shop - so A-Man and I kept trucking.
Then I figured at least a book would be nice and if I have time to whip up something - I'll try!
While shopping for books (and discovering this fantastic one about intarsia - I'm a total newbie at knitting with multiple colours), A-Man disappeared.
I occasionally called his name out and he would come to me to check in, but when he didn't do that, I got concerned.
I paid for my stuff upstairs, circled both floors three times and even checked the elevator.
No A-Man.
"HE'S GONE!!!" - My frantic text to the spouse...
(No response).
Then running back upstairs, realized the front doors are automatic.
I ran out and looked around and thought quickly where he would go by himself, that he knows.
A) Hesburger -across from me
B) McDonalds -opposite direction
C) Mestarin Herkku - a grocery store beneath Sokos -also across from me
D) The bus stop - down the hill
What direction am I supposed to f*cking go?!
Then I see the police!!
Hmm, ask them for help in finding my kid and perhaps have them think I'm a crappy mother OR - keep looking for him on my own...OR suck it up and ask them for help anyway?
Then I see him. I see his little dark grey hat covered in colourful bugs, his beige puffy vest and his tear-streaked face...and all the panic I have whooshes out of me.
He's sitting on the police officer's lap in the paddy-wagon that I'm staring down.
I rub my eyes and squint again and the police van is slowly cruising by because it's a pedestrian-only street and I run over to the van and wave to the passenger-side police officer.
He looks over at me and clearly my 2-year old recognizes me and starts bouncing wildly in the guys' lap.
They open the door and A-Man is screaming, "ÄITI!!!" (Mom in Finnish) and clinging to my neck...I'm crying and thanking the police officer and as they drive away, my 2-year old decides he must shove me aside and wave good-bye to his friends.
Yep - and scream, "HEI HEI!" (bye-bye) to his new BFFs.
Repeatedly...for a solid 10 seconds...
And of course everyone is already curious why this expat-lookin' lady ran up to a police van and how she could (obviously) possibly lose her child...
So once they saw A-Man, snot-running, tears drying toddler wave and scream good-bye to the police...there were lots of smiles and chuckles.
"Got him!" - my text to the spouse.
(No response.)
How far did he get?!
No idea - I forgot to ask. It was about 15-20 minutes of his being lost - I was just happy he was back in my arms.
And I'm also glad he didn't take anything from the book store on the way out or pee on the officer's lap.
We went straight home from there and my face is all puffy from crying and embarrassment and when we walk in the door, SH looks at me and I asked him, "Did you get my messages?"
I'd like to think I used my calm as death voice...the scarier than screaming voice...
"Nooo....um why? What happened?" - he goes to find it...it was in a coat pocket, in the closet with the door shut.
"What do you mean he went missing?"
After a repeat of what happened, he tries to not laugh. Then he says (semi) proudly,
"Never thought he'd be in a cop car this young, huh?"
Seriously?!
BIMU
Tuesday, 7 October 2014
"He's potty-trained!...oh crap."
The past two weeks have been awesome here I must say.
A-Man has been interested in watching me use the bathroom and when day-care started again, and they have regular potty-using-times...he quickly became a champ. But he continued to soak a diaper during nap times and most nights.
Then about three weeks ago, he decided he wasn't wearing a diaper at day-care. So they lent him little underpants and he stayed dry the whole day and immediately sat on the potty when we got home.
The first night, I was terrified - truly never been more fearful of a toddler because of what he was wearing under his pants! So we put a pull-up diaper on top of his underpants, had a protective sheet on the bed and he was dry.
He woke up by 6:30am and pottied.
After that, we trusted him enough and for two and a half weeks solid, he had three accidents of the #2 variety and it wasn't in the bed.
The bed is fairly new - hence my stress about extra bodily fluids/matter getting on the bed.
So we continued to cheer him on, every time he peed or poo-d and we decided to not offer any sort of materialistic reward (i.e. candies, money, stickers etc.) for using the potty because in reality - when he's 5, 10, 25, 50-years old...nobody's going to give him those things for taking a leak or having a dump.
Sorry to be quite blunt - but it's true.
Of course, every parent does what they want for raising their kids - and for us, it's just a matter of him enjoying huge amounts of praise and attention, high-fives and big hugs and kisses...he loves it and knows that he did something really well.
Why spoil those moments?
So his potty is set outside the bathroom door, because our bathroom is pretty small and having a potty in there would be pretty much impossible...and after he's done doing his business, one of us hands him some toilet paper to wipe himself, empties his potty (just the pot itself comes out), flushes all that and washes his hands.
It's a routine and it works.
So two nights ago - he peed in the bed. In my dream, I couldn't figure out why I smelled poop, and worried my dog was ill and had diarrhea.
Nope - I woke up and it was pee...and our bed was soaked. Thanks to the sheet underneath (the water-proof stuff with an absorbent layer on top) the mattress was dry.
Last night, not so lucky. The second piece of leak-proof fabric we have, had scrunched up under the bed sheet - so the mattress is a bit wet.
*Momster is growing...
I know accidents happen - I get it. But he was doing awesome for the past three weeks and then two days in a row - he peed. He's almost 3 and is getting more comfortable with pooping in the potty (at first he was so grossed out, he'd hide to poop) and with using grown up toilets in other people's homes.
The first night, I figure maybe we let him sleep in too late (it is getting pretty dark in Finland!) and his body kept going despite him being super asleep.
So the second morning I woke him up by 7 and did a good morning, "Let's go potty bud!" cheer.
Too late.
Tonight, we suggested he wear a diaper and we were so sure he would throw a fit and protest. But I think he realized that something's going on - so he should wear a diaper. He tossed his undies and is rocking a diaper and I can hopefully sleep a solid 5-6 hours tonight without having to wake up sniffing for pee.
With that - I bid you good night.
BIMU
PS Just finished season 1 of Breaking Bad and onto season 2....INSANE!
A-Man has been interested in watching me use the bathroom and when day-care started again, and they have regular potty-using-times...he quickly became a champ. But he continued to soak a diaper during nap times and most nights.
Then about three weeks ago, he decided he wasn't wearing a diaper at day-care. So they lent him little underpants and he stayed dry the whole day and immediately sat on the potty when we got home.
The first night, I was terrified - truly never been more fearful of a toddler because of what he was wearing under his pants! So we put a pull-up diaper on top of his underpants, had a protective sheet on the bed and he was dry.
He woke up by 6:30am and pottied.
After that, we trusted him enough and for two and a half weeks solid, he had three accidents of the #2 variety and it wasn't in the bed.
The bed is fairly new - hence my stress about extra bodily fluids/matter getting on the bed.
So we continued to cheer him on, every time he peed or poo-d and we decided to not offer any sort of materialistic reward (i.e. candies, money, stickers etc.) for using the potty because in reality - when he's 5, 10, 25, 50-years old...nobody's going to give him those things for taking a leak or having a dump.
Sorry to be quite blunt - but it's true.
Of course, every parent does what they want for raising their kids - and for us, it's just a matter of him enjoying huge amounts of praise and attention, high-fives and big hugs and kisses...he loves it and knows that he did something really well.
Why spoil those moments?
So his potty is set outside the bathroom door, because our bathroom is pretty small and having a potty in there would be pretty much impossible...and after he's done doing his business, one of us hands him some toilet paper to wipe himself, empties his potty (just the pot itself comes out), flushes all that and washes his hands.
It's a routine and it works.
So two nights ago - he peed in the bed. In my dream, I couldn't figure out why I smelled poop, and worried my dog was ill and had diarrhea.
Nope - I woke up and it was pee...and our bed was soaked. Thanks to the sheet underneath (the water-proof stuff with an absorbent layer on top) the mattress was dry.
Last night, not so lucky. The second piece of leak-proof fabric we have, had scrunched up under the bed sheet - so the mattress is a bit wet.
*Momster is growing...
I know accidents happen - I get it. But he was doing awesome for the past three weeks and then two days in a row - he peed. He's almost 3 and is getting more comfortable with pooping in the potty (at first he was so grossed out, he'd hide to poop) and with using grown up toilets in other people's homes.
The first night, I figure maybe we let him sleep in too late (it is getting pretty dark in Finland!) and his body kept going despite him being super asleep.
So the second morning I woke him up by 7 and did a good morning, "Let's go potty bud!" cheer.
Too late.
Tonight, we suggested he wear a diaper and we were so sure he would throw a fit and protest. But I think he realized that something's going on - so he should wear a diaper. He tossed his undies and is rocking a diaper and I can hopefully sleep a solid 5-6 hours tonight without having to wake up sniffing for pee.
With that - I bid you good night.
BIMU
PS Just finished season 1 of Breaking Bad and onto season 2....INSANE!
Thursday, 2 October 2014
Our Money Talk
The hubby and I sat down a few nights ago and took a look at our internet banking and were both shocked at the amount of money we (I) were spending.
I do majority of the grocery shopping - I'd say about 99% because I'm the one that does the cooking (98%) - SH helps out when needed but for the most part - I do it. Also, I'm currently a stay-at-home mother - so I should be able to fit in grocery shopping into my schedule.
Not that we're stuck in the old times but to be honest, I love cooking and baking and it gives me a slight break from the kids and therefor gives him time to bond and play with them.
So we discovered that we could be saving nearly half my husband's paycheck (my maternity leave pays most of our bills) if we cut back on our grocery store visits.
I was going to the grocery store nearly everyday and spending anywhere from 10€ (a very "light" day of milk and bread, juice and perhaps some eggs) to 50€ a trip!
And if there were holidays coming up (aka store closures) or visitors - well, then some trips were much more than that!
Alright, so we decided to set a goal for ourselves (me) - no more than 150€ per week for groceries. And to top that - only one - maximum two - trips to the grocery store.
We started this last week and I've been to the grocery store for a large amount of food (about 60€ worth) once. The other two trips were for small things like milk and bread and some bananas.
So I am definitely keeping it under 100€ for last week and this week - I don't think I will even have to go do a "large" trip with my huge back pack!!
Just got some toilet paper and laundry soap before sitting down to try and finish this - definitely won't need a big trip this week at all!
Now, know that we're a family of 4.5. Technically 5, yes, but M-Girl has 2 bottom teeth and doesn't eat a full sized portion and can't eat some foods yet either (i.e. dairy, salad, nuts, honey etc.) at the age of 8 months-ish.
We were spending on average over 600€ a month on groceries - EEK! (And 600€ is a rough guess-timate!)
And when you consider the Duggar family - 19 kids + 2 parents + 1 fiancée (22 people and not including visiting family members or friends for dinner!) spend about 2000-3000€ a month and we were nearing 1/3 of that...it really put things into perspective for me that we need to cut back and do it now.
So after our little chit-chat I decided to write a list of things that I could make for dinner that were both easy, fairly quick to make in advance or prepare fresh and financially friendly for us to stick to that 100€/week.
Here's some ideas I wrote down. These are meals that guaranteed three of us will eat and the boys are a bit fussier...:
So far, we've done great with the no more than 2 big trips a week...I went last week for 1 big trip and 1 little trip to the grocery store.
This week I went to the grocery store I think 3 times but it was all for little things, so 20€ or less per trip.
With the exception of today...I bought some Christmas gifts for the V-Man (Finnish band dvds for him).
So thinking tonight I'll make stir-fry, tomorrow I have a roast chicken already marinating in the freezer in a ziploc bag...Saturday could be spaghetti and Sunday we're going to a friend's home for dinner and I have the ingredients already for dessert I'm bringing!
Wahoo!
I'm trying to cook up most of the meat from the freezer (mostly sausages since I last ordered 4kg worth!) and limit myself to once a week for buying all of the meat we need for the week.
Other ways we're trying to save money is by not eating out as much. Sure it's usually something fast-food related because taking V-Man into a fancier restaurant is usually a recipe for disaster. He's impatient and expects food right away and when he's done, he also wants to leave the same way too.
I also don't bring the boys with me grocery shopping anymore.
They're tempted to go for the burger restaurant that's nearby and they know the routes in every shop - it's kind of creepy.
Also, I definitely need to do more baking at home! Muffins, cookies and so on can go a long way for mere pennies!
And finally? I'm allowing myself to go to the second-hand store only once every two weeks.
I plan to go this weekend - hopefully alone...with the strict intention of getting some winter boots for the V-Man.
So let's see how this goes! :)
BIMU
I do majority of the grocery shopping - I'd say about 99% because I'm the one that does the cooking (98%) - SH helps out when needed but for the most part - I do it. Also, I'm currently a stay-at-home mother - so I should be able to fit in grocery shopping into my schedule.
Not that we're stuck in the old times but to be honest, I love cooking and baking and it gives me a slight break from the kids and therefor gives him time to bond and play with them.
So we discovered that we could be saving nearly half my husband's paycheck (my maternity leave pays most of our bills) if we cut back on our grocery store visits.
I was going to the grocery store nearly everyday and spending anywhere from 10€ (a very "light" day of milk and bread, juice and perhaps some eggs) to 50€ a trip!
And if there were holidays coming up (aka store closures) or visitors - well, then some trips were much more than that!
Alright, so we decided to set a goal for ourselves (me) - no more than 150€ per week for groceries. And to top that - only one - maximum two - trips to the grocery store.
We started this last week and I've been to the grocery store for a large amount of food (about 60€ worth) once. The other two trips were for small things like milk and bread and some bananas.
So I am definitely keeping it under 100€ for last week and this week - I don't think I will even have to go do a "large" trip with my huge back pack!!
Just got some toilet paper and laundry soap before sitting down to try and finish this - definitely won't need a big trip this week at all!
Now, know that we're a family of 4.5. Technically 5, yes, but M-Girl has 2 bottom teeth and doesn't eat a full sized portion and can't eat some foods yet either (i.e. dairy, salad, nuts, honey etc.) at the age of 8 months-ish.
We were spending on average over 600€ a month on groceries - EEK! (And 600€ is a rough guess-timate!)
And when you consider the Duggar family - 19 kids + 2 parents + 1 fiancée (22 people and not including visiting family members or friends for dinner!) spend about 2000-3000€ a month and we were nearing 1/3 of that...it really put things into perspective for me that we need to cut back and do it now.
So after our little chit-chat I decided to write a list of things that I could make for dinner that were both easy, fairly quick to make in advance or prepare fresh and financially friendly for us to stick to that 100€/week.
Here's some ideas I wrote down. These are meals that guaranteed three of us will eat and the boys are a bit fussier...:
- Roast chicken dinner
- Left over chicken can go into fried rice! (Eggs, bacon, chicken, Chinese sausage, frozen peas is what I usually put in there.)
- Roast beef (when on sale) dinner
- Roast pork dinner (not a huge fan of pork but anyways!)
- Turkey breast - one huge one is enough to feed all of us and that's assuming the boys even eat it.
- Fajitas/tortillas
- Tortilla lasagna (excellent for using up those leftover tortillas!)
- Meatloaf
- Singapore vermicelli (rice noodles are super fast to cook - pretty much soak in hot water and ta-da!)
- Stir-fry
- Thai curry stir-fry
- Sausages (we ordered about 4kg from Craig Beckley's Sausages in Vantaa area - I soo recommend them and will write a separate review soon!). So the sausages are purchased per kilo and they're 13€/kg. So with about 10 sausages in 1 kilogram it's 1,30€ a sausage per person. REALLY can't beat that!
- Home-made pizza
- Spaghetti
- Fried chicken
- Home-made hamburgers with potato wedges (yep - even the buns were home-made! Here's the recipe for those!)
- Porkchops with bbq sauce - hubby's preference...not mine.
- Ribs are super cheap here - and while they're time consuming to cook (3 hours on low in the oven) - they're worth it.
- Beef stew in the slow cooker.
- Indian-style curry - yep - in the slow cooker.
- Yoghurt and granola with honey (mostly for me - nobody seems to enjoy that...)
- Bacon and eggs
- Sausage and eggs
- French Toast
- Slow-cooker oatmeal with apple slices
- Hashbrown mix (usually contains meat) and I mix in a few eggs and scramble it up.
So far, we've done great with the no more than 2 big trips a week...I went last week for 1 big trip and 1 little trip to the grocery store.
This week I went to the grocery store I think 3 times but it was all for little things, so 20€ or less per trip.
With the exception of today...I bought some Christmas gifts for the V-Man (Finnish band dvds for him).
So thinking tonight I'll make stir-fry, tomorrow I have a roast chicken already marinating in the freezer in a ziploc bag...Saturday could be spaghetti and Sunday we're going to a friend's home for dinner and I have the ingredients already for dessert I'm bringing!
Wahoo!
I'm trying to cook up most of the meat from the freezer (mostly sausages since I last ordered 4kg worth!) and limit myself to once a week for buying all of the meat we need for the week.
Other ways we're trying to save money is by not eating out as much. Sure it's usually something fast-food related because taking V-Man into a fancier restaurant is usually a recipe for disaster. He's impatient and expects food right away and when he's done, he also wants to leave the same way too.
I also don't bring the boys with me grocery shopping anymore.
They're tempted to go for the burger restaurant that's nearby and they know the routes in every shop - it's kind of creepy.
Also, I definitely need to do more baking at home! Muffins, cookies and so on can go a long way for mere pennies!
And finally? I'm allowing myself to go to the second-hand store only once every two weeks.
I plan to go this weekend - hopefully alone...with the strict intention of getting some winter boots for the V-Man.
So let's see how this goes! :)
BIMU
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