BIMU Reviews: A Pinterest Win!: No Churn Ice-Cream

I've been on the eat-healthy wagon lately.
I've even been on the be more active wagon lately too thanks to a nearby neighbour and her adorable puppy.
I am pretty sure I lost weight because clothes are fitting better but I can't even confirm the figures for you because I never remember to buy batteries for my scale.

Then I frigging discovered No Churn Ice-Cream on Pinterest.
I wasn't really into Pinterest until recently and now it's part of MY bed time ritual!

Now when it comes to Pinterest projects - especially food ones - I try to keep an open mind and hope to heck they work.
I had an ice-cream machine and never used it.  Bought it for 10€ and ended up selling it off on Facebook to a friend.
I like love the idea of home-made ice-cream and this was simple enough:

• Heavy whipping cream
• Sweetened condensed milk
• Chocolate syrup or vanilla extract or whatever you want it to taste like

Mix cream alone until stiff peaks appear, add condensed milk and flavouring - freeze it.

So I made it yesterday.

38% fat whipping cream is the heaviest I could find in Finland.  

I just made vanilla flavour to try and because we had guests coming over - so I had some freshly baked cookies to go with this.

Pros?

• I don't need an ice-cream making machine = saves space.
• I don't need to freeze a bowl in advance like most machines require you to do.
• I just need my stand mixer and a dish to put the ice-cream in. = saves money because I have these things already.
• I don't have to add sugar or eggs or cook it = saves time and I get to choose what goes into my ice-cream = I don't feel too bad about letting my kids have some as a treat!
• It's fricking delicious!

Cons?

• It takes longer than 4 hours to freeze in my freezer - but maybe that's just mine.  Or because I packed so much into my loaf baking dish.
• I splattered cream all over my wall because the mixer was on high at first - that's not really a con - that's my fault.  So tip for you - start slow and once it thickens - then you can put the speed up a bit more.

I blog in my undies and I approve of that Pinterest recipe! :D
BIMU

BIMU Reviews: Exfoliating Socks

This blog post contains disgusting photos of my cracked and peeling feet.
It's a non-affiliated blog review of exfoliating socks on horribly cracked and dry feet.

I had seen something on People Magazine's website about these exfoliating socks for about 25$ from Amazon. I am usually not one to watch beauty product reviews but this screamed at me because if they do work - my feet could use them!
I didn't get mine from Amazon but ended up forgetting about them and then happened to come across them (similar) in the grocery store's beauty section!

They were 22€ or so and seeing as pedicures are so much more here - I figured it was well worth it.
That and the last time I had a pedicure was while pregnant with V-Man and it was a going away gift from my work colleagues! I also haven't bothered looking around here because my feet are so horribly and deeply cracked like an ancient mummy!  It's embarrassing and the poor lady would probably have to get a professional sanding machine to attack my dry feet!

I waited awhile before I actually got to try them because I needed to figure out when I was going to put them on!
They're to be worn for 90 minutes solid and your feet should peel within 2-3 days and up to 15 days.
I stuffed my feet into the plastic booties, taped them down (they did smell strongly of alcohol) and watched a movie.
I rinsed my feet after and my skin was super soft. I was tempted to scrub the thick layers with a foot file but decided against it.

They didn't peel until 6 days afterward and as they continued to peel - I was ecstatic!
It was working!
Some things you should know about using these (that may or may not be listed in the instructions - I wouldn't know because it wasn't written in English):

• Yes your feet will peel like cray-cray (extremely crazy is what I'm guessing this means and not like a cray fish) - so keep wearing socks and you probably don't want to wear sandals.
• You can and SHOULD moisturize - they'll STILL peel! (Wish I knew this a bit earlier on but anyway.)
• Your feet are going to be sensitive because of the thicker excess dried layers are gone/in the process of shedding. 
• You might not be able to handle as hot or cold temperatures in the tub/shower as what you're used to.
• Stepping on crumbs was very painful for me - never mind Lego pieces or toy cars!
• It's worth it! :D

I may have deleted those photos of my feet in the booties - as I can't find them anymore - but it's pretty simple to use and here are some pics I happened to find on my phone of the 6-days later results!

Peeling like a snake!

Tops of my feet too!

I noticed that one part of my feet that didn't peel all the way were my heels.  The layers of dry and cracked skin must be too thick even for the exfoliating socks!

Overall?  I'd do it again and probably have to anyway.  I've been wearing sandals and the skin is toughening up again.
Now that I know that I can moisturize afterward - I will and I think it'll make a difference too!

Happy feet to you,

BIMU

A Side of Autism: Needles

I don't mind needles but I can't say the same for V-Man.
He has never enjoyed a single blood test or vaccine and I don't blame him.
His first big blood test around the time he was being diagnosed and tested for autism (when he was 2) was something straight out of a horror movie.
First of all, he was fighting and screaming without any needles near him. It was just the strap on his arm to help make his vein pop out a bit more.
Then it took three nurses plus me to hold him down and a fourth to get the blood.
He was 2.
It was a really crappy situation because the nurse wasn't quite experienced with super strong autistic children and the blood went everywhere (this is the horror story bit) - I mean spraying down his arm, into his lap, out and forward.
In the meantime, V-Man was thrashing about and tried biting me, clawing at my face and giving a nurse a few good kicks too.  We both left sobbing and I threatened SH that he better be doing these blood tests from now on.
He was 2.

Today I finally decided to suck it up and bring him in for some blood tests to see if he has lactose-intolerance or Celiac.
His regular doctor (she's a real twit-honestly!) doesn't seem to understand our frustration of having to change 8-12 crappy diapers a day. So every time V-Man had a doctor appointment with her, for the past 2 years- she continued to not take us seriously and kept recommending laxatives.  Which we tried but it didn't seem to make a difference.
Finally and recently, V-Man had his yearly assessment at the disability clinic and the doctor there suggested he gets these blood tests done.
Seeing as V-Man magically stopped drinking milk (dairy, soy, rice and oats-pretty much anything white) and doesn't like dairy products-she's leaning towards lactose intolerance.  And also a blood sample for Celiac too just in case.

So today I brought him downtown with his half a bagel and a fully charged cell phone and we went to the blood clinic downtown to only find out that it had moved.
After going up and down the wrong street - we finally found it and we didn't have to wait long.
We walked in and I immediately handed over his Kela card and advised the nurse that V-Man is autistic in Finnish and that we need another person to help me hold him down (in English).
She immediately went off and got someone - which was awesome she believed me (we've had situations before where it got messy - like the first test) - and we went to it.
I had V-Man in my lap and while I appreciate him flattening my thighs a little - after awhile we decided that it wasn't working.  I had Teletubbies on Youtube playing on my phone and to the side and out of his reach and still it wasn't distracting enough.
He was twisting and moving his shoulders and we had him sit in the chair himself and I held him back and into the seat from behind.  Then the other nurse held down his hands and arms.  The second nurse got into his vein and the blood flow wasn't as fast and he needed 3(!) vials of blood for these tests.
He started to wiggle (along with screaming and crying) and the needle was close to breaking - because it was bending at such a disgusting angle.
So they removed that, wiped up the blood and taped up his arm.
Onto arm 2!  We finally managed to get it all sorted and even though the first vial wasn't very full - I'm assuming it was just enough.

After what felt like the longest 15 minutes ever - he was done and we left.
After every appointment with him, we go for lunch and try to put the horror of a bad appointment behind us.
I just honestly don't know what we'll do when he's older!  He'll just get bigger and stronger - I'm predicting he'll be bigger and stronger than me and SH...
I guess I just need to be happy that his lactose test only involved 1 vial of blood - where mine involved several samples over a span of a few hours!

Oh well - at least it's done and over with!
Perhaps next time I should bring some wine and cheese for the nurses...I know I could've used a drink after!
BIMU

Travelling WITHOUT An Autistic Child

Yup - we did it.
Sorry for the delay - our modem died shortly before we went on vacation and once we got back - had to request a new one.  And I don't know about you lovely folks - but if I use my phone for blogging - I wouldn't make any sense at all.  (I have done it in the past and I spent a lot of time having to edit them so they make more sense in the end!)

So yeah....a 4-days long vacation without the V-Man!
I have only the slightest regret in not bringing him because we were staying with very dear friends of ours that he's known since A-Man was born (they were the baby-sitters for V-Man when it was time for us to rush off to the hospital) - and he would've had a blast at their place.

Do I really, truly regret not bringing V-Man?

No I don't.

Call me a horrible mother, call me a bitch, tell me it's not fair - I really don't mind.
And I'll tell you why.

A) This is our first time travelling outside of our city without the V-Man.  He has been to Estonia, Sweden, Paris, Canada and the UK (which was our last family trip - a pure nightmare and I was pregnant with M-Girl - so nearly 2 years ago!).  We haven't even gone to Tampere (1.5 hours away) as a family or Helsinki (3.5 hours away) either.

B) He's hated every single f-ing moment of the travelling bit.  The leaving of his home, our dogs (they never travel with us - we hook them up with wonderful doggy-sitters instead), his familiar environment and the potential ear popping - and let's not forget - time zone differences!
Even an hour rocks his world.
Maybe things will change when he gets older - I certainly hope so!

C) We don't have friends or family here that are able to handle the V-Man while we're able to go for vacation.  Or even for 1 night out of 365- like our anniversary as an example.
What we do have now - is the overnight care system (or "respite care" if you will) and while we've had it for awhile, we've been nervous about actually leaving the city or country to make use of him not being with us for 3 days.
Lately, he's had a longer stays - about a week long - and still - we didn't go anywhere!
Just. In. Case.
I've been studying, SH had pneumonia, M-Girl is currently cutting 2 teeth and I recently got back in touch with my biological mother!
Anyhow, where was I?  Right, so we finally decided that we would take a small vacation and fly from Helsinki to Copenhagen and stay in Malmö, Sweden with friends.

Now, let's tackle those possible things you might be thinking of us.

• Horrible parents: Going on a vacation for the first time without V-Man (and still bringing a teething child and a sensitive 3-year old) in nearly 6 years - I don't think it's a terrible thing.  Not like we have date nights weekly (never mind monthly) or we have grandparents for the kids to chill at for awhile here and there.  And the V-Man is 5 - he's not a newborn staying behind.
• But he's losing the oppourtunity to travel:  He hates travelling!  Why put him through torture (i.e. ears popping, time difference, loss of comfort and familiarity, strangers and different languages)?
• It's not fair - he's spending less time with you: I assure you - he gets more attention there at overnight care than he possibly can with us and the other two children in tow.  We do try our hardest to split up attention and special one-on-one time regularly.
• The way we've come to see it is that it's a break for everyone.  He gets a break from fighting with A-Man and listening to M-Girl scream (A-Man too) and he gets a break from odd and random schedules.  He's in a deep and strict routine there and we're not there to interrupt it.
• We get a break from him grabbing our chests, sniffing our pits and our bums (maybe he's imitating a dog?!), having to watch him every second of the day and we can go to have a date or take the kids out for dinner - where fast-food isn't entirely involved.

I had 1 friend ask me if it was fair to leave a child behind.  I'm assuming other friends think this too but haven't asked.

No - it's not 100% fair to do this.  But is it fair to drag (seriously) a child with non-verbal autism to various countries for the sake of giving "him an experience he'll remember"?  Maybe he will - fantastic!  And maybe those memories will be horrific for him.  And if we ever have to move abroad or travel together abroad - it'll just be a pure nightmare for him (everyone) all over again. 

In reflection of our first big trip without V-Man and with all the events that happened - here's why it wouldn't have gone well for him:

• About 3.5 hours train ride to Helsinki - no way to get out without probably being left behind.  He hasn't done this in about 2 years - who knows what the end results would've been.
• Our bus was stuck in traffic and we were quite stressed out about checking in on time.  V-Man can sense our stress and reacts whichever way he deems fit at that moment.  That can be a yay or a nay.
• He's been running away a lot lately - it's a game to be chased.  
• Now picture security check time...
• He's been bashing his head a lot.  Not only is this sad and frustrating - it's also severely embarrassing that we cannot do anything to comfort him in that moment.
• When we arrived to Copenhagen, our stroller did not.  We had to have it shipped to our friends' home or take the risk that it was on the following flight and wait nearly 1½ hours to get it.  
• We waited and thankfully got it.
• The Wi-Fi in Copenhagen's airport took ages to kick in - nearly an hour.  There's no way he'd be entertained without Youtube or rubbing chests or digging through random strangers' bags.
• It actually got dark in Malmö at night and that probably would've freaked him out.
• Time difference of 1 hour.
• On our way home - we opted to go to Copenhagen the day we were flying out and we rushed a lot here and there and it was so hot and sunny - loads of people were out and about.  We took a Hop On/Hop Off bus tour - who knows if he'd like it or not.  He likes buses in general - so perhaps!
• We also had to wait 20 minutes for the following bus to arrive to take us back to the center.
• On our way to the airport - not the first, nor the second but ALL 3 trains we sat on to take us from the city center to the airport advised in Danish and English that "the staff were not present on the train - so please have patience as we can't leave yet".  Train 3 clarified with "the staff are stuck in Sweden for some reason - we'll leave as soon as we can!"
• I was in tears after dragging our friends, our luggage and two tired children - one whom I was carrying - (imagine a third!) and a stroller on a horrible game of Musical Trains.
• We had less than an hour to get to final check-in.  Hence my tears.
• We ended up arriving and getting our baggage just as the last bus of the night was going back to our home.  No trains after 8pm - so we had to wait until 2am to get a bus.  
• That means definitely having to wake him up (and the others) and possibly trying to carry 2 children while pushing a stroller and carrying our (mostly carry-on) luggage.
• When we arrived in our city - because it was a weekend - the bus schedule was changed and we had to wait an hour for the first morning bus to take us home.  (We wanted to get back onto the saving money train and not take a cab.)

So I can happily say that I don't have very many regrets at all about this trip!  We got him presents of course and we took a lot of photos.

Knowing he was somewhere safe, comfortable and happy was our main concern and made travelling that much easier.  Especially considering the freak out with the final train ride to the airport!
It was liberating in a sense and we didn't have to stress about every tiny detail that could possibly upset him and therefor shortening our stay or skipping out on popular tourist attractions...
It was relaxing and isn't that what a vacation is SUPPOSED to be?

I'm not saying we plan to have a mini vacation every time he goes there - but perhaps once or twice a year never hurt anyone.

I do apologize if some of this post comes off as repeatitive - but I'm watching an episode (the final one!) of Agent Carter and chatting with friends online.
Can you tell we haven't had internet at home in awhile? :)

Have a lovely day,

BIMU

Life With Kids: Our Revised Bed-Time Routines

Things have certainly changed (mostly) for the better now that the kids all sleep in their own beds and in the same room!
Of course M-Girl occasionally wakes up and wants to crawl in bed with us and just because it's summer doesn't mean we get to sleep in AT ALL.  We've been up by 6 am (usually around 5:30 - like this morning) every freaking day this summer holiday.
I may as well be in cadet summer camp again! I told a friend and it's true.

Anyway, if you're wondering what it's like in our household to put 3 kids to bed - here we go!
I am mentally working on other posts but we are going to be travelling from Tuesday to Friday - so there will probably be a few delays as usual!

• 7-7:30 pm - V-Man is the first to get ready and the first to go down.  He gets 2mg of melatonin after brushing his teeth and lies in his bed while SH reads his e-book.
• 7:30 pm - A-Man and M-Girl get their teeth brushed and get ready for bed.
• 7:45 pm - I lie down with M-Girl and give her the teddy bears and cover her in a blanket.  Then she sticks her bare little feet at me because I am expected/we have this ritual where I must sniff her feet and make silly faces and gagging/barfing sounds.  It makes her laugh - so I do it and her feet are cute now.  
• I absolutely hate feet - so I'm enjoying this for as long as possible because grown-up feet are just gross.  Useful and practical in every way - but they're just stumps with long extensions (toes).
• Once my duty of sniffing feet is done - I'm usually responding to e-mails, on Facebook or blogging on my phone.
• While M-Girl is with me and SH is with V-Man, A-Man is quietly (trying) reading and playing a colour board game.  He regularly runs back and forth demanding someone comes to play with him but if either of us moves - then the kids get back up and running around again.
• 8:00 pm A-Man is back and demanding I crawl in his bed to sleep with him.  But I can't because M-Girl is now super awake.  I explain repeatedly that I cannot leave until M-Girl is asleep - every single night.
• 8:20 pm - M-Girl is usually asleep by now and I crawl into A-Man's bed and he tucks me in and blows me a kiss and tells me he loves me "Va care ya".
  Within 10 minutes he is asleep and I'm usually in an intense conversation with a friend - usually from Canada on Whatsapp.

So typically by 9 pm and after nearly 2 hours of getting the kids ready to sleep - they're finally out.

In case you're wondering, no - I can't just toss them into the bedroom and tell them to play quietly (or not at all) until they go to sleep.  They're still pretty young for that and A-Man is so disruptive that he keeps the others awake.

And I don't want them to have a screaming match - which always leads to someone getting pinched, slapped or their eyes poked (M-Girl's latest move for retaliating against her brothers)...

This is a huge difference compared to having A-Man and M-Girl in bed with me and SH having to sleep with V-Man on the sofa bed!

Yesterday was a huge change to our schedule and our kids didn't get to sleep until nearly 9:30 pm because we had our future dog-sitters/my classmate/friend over with her family.

They were gone by 8 pm which was lovely because that meant all the kids were super tired after!

But the saddest thing was that V-Man really enjoyed having them over so much that he began really smacking his head when they were leaving and screaming like crazy.

SH had to pick him up and squeeze him hard and whisper that it was okay - they can visit another time.

It was V-Man's first time meeting my friends and while I'm super glad that he had fun with them (my classmate's chest was not spared by the V-Man's grip!) - I wish he didn't get so upset that they had to leave (they have a little one about M-Girl's age and it was way past his bedtime!).

Happy Sunday,

BIMU

A Side Of Autism: Can He Have Some Boobs With That??

Yes you read the title correctly and no, we didn't take the V-Man to a strip club.
Today is officially day 2 of summer vacation (this was written on the 20th of June) and I did a lot of shouting. The weather looked promising and we tried to go on a family hike with the dogs and nope. V-Man was not having it. He wanted to go on the bus.
Today is Mid Summer in Finland...no bus on this holiday!
We tried letting him pick the route but after thirty minutes (or was it only 15?) - I gave up and told him we are taking Loki and A-Man home. He seemed thrilled until we walked past the bus stop.
Some more screaming - from him- which would've been fine by me if he wasn't accompanying those screams with threats to bite us and break our fingers...oh and slapping his right side of his head so hard he now has a large purple bruise there.

Anyway the rest of the day the kids were squirrely and we didn't know what to do. It rained on and off and now it's pouring out and there was some thunder (they're asleep so I guess it's moot now) - but we survived the day.
I assure you there was a lot of shouting today.

One of V-Man's interests/super annoying things he does - is rub boobs.  Specifically - nipples!
Mine, yours, male or female- big or small- it doesn't matter.
Teacher, stranger, parents, friends - pretty much any adult will do!
And I get it- he has gets a reaction out of people and the more they dislike it (aka me) the more of a challenge it becomes.  How fun!
Also, with male boobs-they typically don't wear bras and that means instant cause and effect -if you know what I mean.
Women who wear padded bras are just a bump in the road or a challenge to him.  Again - how fun!

And if I haven't said it already-this boob rushing annoys the dear f*ck out of me.
And if you're wondering if he was breastfed long enough, I assure you - he's never had formula (except possibly at the hospital after birth) and he was nursed until he was 14 months old.

This boob rubbing/grabbing phase comes and goes and as of about a week ago-it's back-full on.
I just really hope it doesn't stick around - or else this could be incredibly awkward!!
(And I totally hear jail time...)

I recall taking him to the beach when he was about three-years old with little A-Man and V-Man ran away from me to go sit in some young guy's lap and caress his nipples.
I was of course, mortified, alone (SH was abroad at a conference) and stuck in the sand with our stroller.
The guy took it well until V-Man was really rubbing that poor guy's chest and trying to sneak some beer from his can.

I'm just at a loss of what to do to stop this behaviour. I can shout and slap his hand away until the cows come home...I can wear a thick coat (done this before) all summer or until this phase ends...or let him do it. And I'd rather not. Because while I'm comfortable with my body's shape and I know my son doesn't mean his personal masseuse sessions as sexual - someone might, later on down the road.
So it'd be nice to nip it in the bosom (ha ha ha)...and move on to the next confusing/inappropriate/mind blowing phase that he has stored up for us...
And yes - he's sniffs bums sometimes.

Ciao for now!
BIMU

Thank You Internet.

I am adopted and by adopted I mean I was raised by two parents who cared for me from when I was a very young infant up until I moved out.
I'm not a celebrity baby - nor was I bought from abroad to be raised in Canada.

Now back to the main point of this post now that I have those bits out of the way.
I was always curious to meet my birth parents and when I was about 16, I was in touch by phone and email with my biological father. We chatted semi-regularly and then when I was 20, decided I would fly over by myself to Hong Kong. It was a fantastic trip but I didn't know what to say.
I returned again to China the following year and we did nothing but fight.
Once I returned back to Canada, we kept in touch every few months via email but never Skyped and he didn't have Facebook- so when I got pregnant with V-Man, he reached out a bit more.
After a petty fight via email (over addresses really!) - we've cut ties.
And I'm fine with it. I have a family of my own to raise and if he has no interest in seeing their photos or being a part of their lives (seeing as he also has his own children too)- that's fine with me.
And I don't mean it in a snarky way at all.

What about the birth mom?
Yep, well awhile ago I blogged about having found her and sending her an email.
I kept my email relatively short and to the point.

"Hi,
Pretty sure we know each other. I'm in Finland (hint: I won't come find you), married and have three kids (hint: pretty busy life here too) and have two dogs.
I've debated on trying to find you and if you don't wish to keep in contact with me - I completely understand and apologize for disturbing you.
It'd be nice to be friends."

So something along those lines and I hit send.
I held my breath for about 3 days and realized that because it went to her "Other" folder on Facebook, she probably won't see it.
I've tried finding her before online once I was married and settled in. But there were so many people on Facebook with the same name, and I didn't know if she was married or not (or changed her name) - so I had a hard time tracking her down.
But I wasn't too stressed about it because if it's meant to be - it'll happen.  If not - keep truckin'.
Then for no reason other than to avoid some confusing Finnish homework and also to challenge myself in finding someone in the world - I did a search on Google for her name as I knew her and her graduating university.
A graduation registrar came up and I took that name and searched for her. Instantly I had who I was looking for and then I found her on Facebook, Pinterest and LinkedIn.
Through the Google listings, I discovered I had a half-sister! Wow!
And possibly a brother (turned out to be her spouse)...again - double wow.
Will this change who I am or how I view her? Nah not really. So I sent that email off and waited.
Note: I didn't want to be one of those people sharing and exposing my face while holding a sign and a baby photo of myself (which I have none here) asking the millions of users on Facebook if they knew who my biological mother is.  Not that there's anything wrong with searching for your birth family - but for me - that wasn't quite my style.

I got an email last Sunday evening from her and I was lying in bed waiting for M-Girl to sleep. (It was also the night before V-Man had his tubes surgery - so I was waiting to go to sleep too.)
I was asked some security questions to confirm my identity (when my birthday was, where I was born and where I grew up) and after I answered those - I held my breath.
I got a response confirming it was her and she was thrilled to have me contact her.
It was of course a shock for both of us but I'm learning a lot about her family (3 half sisters...!!!) and for her - I suppose a kind of insta-grandma status.

I don't know what would shock me more - 3 half siblings and a ton of cousins/uncles and a couple aunts being thrown in the mix - or finding out I have three grandchildren.
Probably the latter...yeah?

So it's been a few days and I'm simply in shock and happy that I finally found her- and we are taking things really slow.
We haven't Skyped yet -mostly because 2/3 of the half sisters don't know about me yet and that's fine for me.
I am continuing to call her by her first name because I think it's awkward for myself to call her "Mummy/Mom" and she understands that and is fine with it.

I went into this with 0 expectation because I know and have heard of people putting their children up for adoption because they didn't want to have a connection or because the child was created out of an unfortunate situation (ie rape) and while that wasn't my personal situation - I didn't know what to expect and I didn't want to get my hopes up.  I also wanted to be respectful that she may have no interest in wanting to connect because it's been nearly 30 years and she has 3 daughters to care for and so on.

I'm learning now that it is possible to be friends with a relative and am very content with how things are going so far. It's given me some closure - although, yes I could probably have not searched and been just as content with my life.
It wasn't a life or death situation for me if I didn't have contact with either biological parent but I'm glad that I have because I've learned a lot from both and it helps me identify some things in myself that I couldn't understand before.
We have agreed that if we do fight over something or don't see eye-to-eye - then we will calm down and discuss it in a mature manner as we both don't want to toss away this connection over something petty - like what happened between my biological father and I.

I also told her (and am sharing with you here) that had she tried to find me and reached out when I was younger - I would have been mad.
"Why did you leave me?  Did you not love me?"  You know - hurtful questions would have flown out of my mouth.
But now that I'm older, I'm calmer and more mature and able to understand that it's not easy to give up a child or resist looking for them and contacting them because you don't want to interrupt everything they've ever known.
For me, it's not so personal that she left me with the parents I was raised with - I was raised well and I was loved and turned into a fairly decent person - so I think it's fine.
I had made myself a promise that if I ever did find her (or she finds me) - I would listen and be as understanding as I could be.
So far, it has been smooth sailing and there's no anger or stress - which helps a lot.

Everyone has their own lives to run and perhaps others to care for - so it can be upsetting or confusing to have to adjust your lifestyle to allow someone new into it.
I guess the biggest thing is to be realistic - nothing wrong with being hopeful - but certainly keep your toes on the ground when attempting to find your biological family.

So as much as I have a love/hate relationship with the Internet - I will admit this has solved some puzzles and has been a fairly positive thing.
Internet - you get +10 points.

BIMU

PS - And in case you're wondering - no, this doesn't affect my relationship with my parents (who raised me) - at least in my opinion.  They're still "Mom and Dad" - I just happen to have connected with another person in my life and am seeing where it goes.