Life With Kids: Our Revised Bed-Time Routines

Things have certainly changed (mostly) for the better now that the kids all sleep in their own beds and in the same room!
Of course M-Girl occasionally wakes up and wants to crawl in bed with us and just because it's summer doesn't mean we get to sleep in AT ALL.  We've been up by 6 am (usually around 5:30 - like this morning) every freaking day this summer holiday.
I may as well be in cadet summer camp again! I told a friend and it's true.

Anyway, if you're wondering what it's like in our household to put 3 kids to bed - here we go!
I am mentally working on other posts but we are going to be travelling from Tuesday to Friday - so there will probably be a few delays as usual!

• 7-7:30 pm - V-Man is the first to get ready and the first to go down.  He gets 2mg of melatonin after brushing his teeth and lies in his bed while SH reads his e-book.
• 7:30 pm - A-Man and M-Girl get their teeth brushed and get ready for bed.
• 7:45 pm - I lie down with M-Girl and give her the teddy bears and cover her in a blanket.  Then she sticks her bare little feet at me because I am expected/we have this ritual where I must sniff her feet and make silly faces and gagging/barfing sounds.  It makes her laugh - so I do it and her feet are cute now.  
• I absolutely hate feet - so I'm enjoying this for as long as possible because grown-up feet are just gross.  Useful and practical in every way - but they're just stumps with long extensions (toes).
• Once my duty of sniffing feet is done - I'm usually responding to e-mails, on Facebook or blogging on my phone.
• While M-Girl is with me and SH is with V-Man, A-Man is quietly (trying) reading and playing a colour board game.  He regularly runs back and forth demanding someone comes to play with him but if either of us moves - then the kids get back up and running around again.
• 8:00 pm A-Man is back and demanding I crawl in his bed to sleep with him.  But I can't because M-Girl is now super awake.  I explain repeatedly that I cannot leave until M-Girl is asleep - every single night.
• 8:20 pm - M-Girl is usually asleep by now and I crawl into A-Man's bed and he tucks me in and blows me a kiss and tells me he loves me "Va care ya".
  Within 10 minutes he is asleep and I'm usually in an intense conversation with a friend - usually from Canada on Whatsapp.

So typically by 9 pm and after nearly 2 hours of getting the kids ready to sleep - they're finally out.

In case you're wondering, no - I can't just toss them into the bedroom and tell them to play quietly (or not at all) until they go to sleep.  They're still pretty young for that and A-Man is so disruptive that he keeps the others awake.

And I don't want them to have a screaming match - which always leads to someone getting pinched, slapped or their eyes poked (M-Girl's latest move for retaliating against her brothers)...

This is a huge difference compared to having A-Man and M-Girl in bed with me and SH having to sleep with V-Man on the sofa bed!

Yesterday was a huge change to our schedule and our kids didn't get to sleep until nearly 9:30 pm because we had our future dog-sitters/my classmate/friend over with her family.

They were gone by 8 pm which was lovely because that meant all the kids were super tired after!

But the saddest thing was that V-Man really enjoyed having them over so much that he began really smacking his head when they were leaving and screaming like crazy.

SH had to pick him up and squeeze him hard and whisper that it was okay - they can visit another time.

It was V-Man's first time meeting my friends and while I'm super glad that he had fun with them (my classmate's chest was not spared by the V-Man's grip!) - I wish he didn't get so upset that they had to leave (they have a little one about M-Girl's age and it was way past his bedtime!).

Happy Sunday,

BIMU

Life With Kids: When Does It End?!

So you haven't heard from me in over a week! a couple weeks!
I'm sorry - I really am.  But guess what?

I'm coming down with a cold.  Why? (It's almost done...)

Remember my last post I went on and on about how awesome V-Man was for the dentist?
Yes well it turned out he was sick.  Go figure.  That night he had a wicked fever and it lasted a solid 8 days.
We went to the hospital twice and SH took him to the doctor once for tests and antibiotics. 
A-Man had the fever prior to this dentist appointment then V-Man got it and then he got a throat infection and then it turns out his tubes in his ears are gone and he got an ear infection immediately.
M-Girl also has an ear infection...seriously.

Now I'm the one with a touch of a sore throat, a leaky and semi-stuffed up nose...and a bit of a cough.
I'm fighting it though!  I don't have much of a choice as I'm doing my "työharjoittelu" (work practice) here in Central Finland.
I got the same place as last year when I was pregnant with M-Girl (can you believe she's now a certified 1 year old?!) but had to leave early due to her wanting to come out 1.5 months early.
She didn't make an appearance until she was supposed to...but I was ordered to go on bed rest for the remainder of December 2013 and then my maternity leave started right after that.

And of course no matter where you go - there's coughing kids....everywhere. :)
So there's a short little post for you...

OH WAIT!

Last night the SH went to Helsinki for his monthly (mandatory) meetings and I was home with all three kids and both dogs.  I thankfully finished a bit early yesterday and rushed home, took the dogs out for a good length walk then picked up the V-Man and we went to get his siblings and then I was stumped.

1)  Do I go home and we watch movies non-stop and play games?
or
2)  Do I go crazy and hope A-Man doesn't wet himself (or at least asks for the bathroom) and take them all out for pizza and some shopping?

Oh right - so my phone also kept dying on me (it was an iPhone 3GS kindly donated to me by my awesome neighbour) - so I've figured it really bit the dust and wanted to look at the prices on other iPhones.

I took my kids to a few different stores and they didn't complain whatsoever!
It was an awesome evening and by the time we got home - all three passed out easily. :D

Time to start writing a newer blog post I suppose! :)
BIMU

PS A Finnish friend of mine has two boys and when I told her about everyone being sick she just told me it seems to be a common trend once you have 3 or more!

Shower Training & Poop

Sometimes, okay - all the time - there are things that the V-Man does that doesn't make any sense and it annoys us.
Jumping on the furniture, re-arranging furniture (yeah he's only 5) and today - banging on the bathroom door.
Not a constant pounding - but more or less opening and closing the door (read "slamming") repeatedly.
At first SH was grumpy and yelling at V-Man to stop making so much noise and to leave the door alone.
Then I had a light bulb moment.

"Maybe he needs the toilet?"

Well, the potty's in the living room - full access for A-Man and the smaller potty is slowly getting used by M-Girl (when we remember to try) and V-Man uses them both as stepping stools.
SH thought I was nuts but V-Man is able to pee in the shower - we're just so used to him using his diapers and because his bowels are acting funky for the past 6 months (at least) - he #2s at least 8 times a day.  Nothing solid and nothing large.  Just streaks of mud more or less.
Was that too much info?  Sorry - it's poop and everyone does it somehow.

So I opened the bathroom door and he immediately climbed up onto the toilet (we keep the lid down - yes, my husband does this regularly and I'll explain why later!) and stripped his diaper.
Yep - a streak of poo.
But!  The rest was dry.  So I asked if he needed to pee and to go in the shower.
He immediately dashed in there (it's a stand-alone type) and I waited.  He looked at me expectantly and I turned on a little side hose by the sink and sprayed his boy bits and pow.
He peed.

Thinking this was purely a stroke of luck and it wouldn't happen again, I tried to not get my hopes up.
About an hour later, same thing.

"BANG, BANG BANG" - he was slamming and opening the door again to the bathroom.
I rushed him in there and I gave him a little spray and again - he peed in the shower.

I know and I'm sure - this disgusts many people.
But he is 5-years old - lost all the potty-training ("Elimination Communication") we started at 5-months old due to an infection on his bottom and the pain it caused - so anything remotely close to getting him to stay in a dry diaper - is a big step and one I'm going to approach with enthusiasm.

Of course, we're going to work on getting him to sit on a potty or toilet.  It's a major life skill he needs to learn and one that we need lots of time and patience for.

My goal is to allow him to pee in the shower for a few more days, this is fantastic that he's recognizing the need to pee on his own, and then I'll be putting a potty in the shower and teaching him to sit on it.
Teaching him to poop in the potty is going to be the hardest bit - but if I can get him to at least pee in the shower, on a potty (and eventually move that out of the shower and how to use toilet paper...) - then I'd be a very proud parent.

So what seemed to be an act of annoyance - turned out to be a signal for help.
Patience is really required in this job called parenting! :)
BIMU

PS - SH took him to the bathroom and he stripped down before entering the bathroom and ran into the shower and peed again! :D

PPS:  The Toilet Lid Story
I came home from work one day to my beloved little handsome kitten.  He's just a ball of fluff and 1/4 (they're in Canada - yes 4 cats) and he was more like a dog.
He'd run to the door when he heard me coming home and we'd have a cuddle before I even took my coat off and then we'd go to the kitchen to start supper usually.
During a cuddle one afternoon, SH looks at me and says, "You probably don't want to rub your face too close to him right now."
I have my face buried into his and while he's purring away and rubbing my face with his itty-bitty pink nose - I'm quickly sniffing my cat and not smelling anything odd.
"Why?"
"He fell in the toilet before I got a chance to flush it." - him
"You didn't bathe him?!  Did you crap?!...oh gross!"
"He jumped in faster than I could flush it or put the lid down!"
Excuses....blegh!

I immediately dropped my cat (don't worry - I'm not very tall), disinfected my hands and face and donned on rain gear to give him a bath (the cat - not my husband) and ever since then - he's put the lid down.

** SH claims that he did it anyway before this incident but I'd like to think this more or less sealed the deal.

Life With Kids: Birthday Party Edition

My children are now 5, 3 and under 1 year old.
The boys have had a joint birthday party and yes, even V-Man had one at the age of 1.

When I told this to a friend (and I'm sure other people think the same) - she pointed out that the kids wouldn't remember a first birthday party.
No I imagine not.
But here's my reasons for having a birthday party.

Because of V-Man's autism and at the time we didn't know it and just thought he was just being incredibly difficult in new places or waking up anywhere that wasn't home - so having a party was a great way to bring our friends together.  We could "visit" with several people at one time and have a bit of a social life this way.  That and we had some American friends (without children) who were hoping to meet my whole family at once - so this was perfect.
Then when A-Man was born and because his birthday is two weeks prior to V-Man - it made perfect sense to have a joint birthday party.  It saves us money and time and again, we still get to see those friends all in one go.

The first two years, we hosted it in our home because the weather was warm enough we could keep the dogs on the balcony.
But now that the kids are bigger and can open doors - putting the dogs in a separate bedroom doesn't cut it anymore and it's a bit of a bothersome to put the dogs on the balcony because they occasionally bark at other dogs if they see them.
So the past two years, I've been renting out a community room with a tiny kitchenette included (no stove or oven) but it does the job, has loads of furniture and space and the kids can run around like crazy for 4 hours.
That and we've befriended some people who are:

• Scared of dogs
• Allergic to dogs
• Have severe asthma when around pets or any amount of dust

So this saves us on cleaning, worrying about anyone getting sick and so on.

Last year was a Sesame Street themed party but this year I wasn't going to do any sort of theme.  Maybe Moomins - but when I went to a second-hand store and found a few Spiderman party sets (plates, napkins, treat bags, cards and cups with straws) - for 5€ a box - it seemed like the better way to go.
Then all I needed to get was a table cloth, goodies for the treat bags and of course the food!

"Aren't treat bags kind of fancy?" my friend asked.
Well, they can certainly be extravagant, but I tried to keep things within a budget and practical in the treat bags.
And sugar-free because the party has cake or ice-cream - seems silly to pump them with even more sugar!
Last year I made popcorn balls and reflectors on thick pieces of felt with googly eyes.
I also see treat bags as a little gift of thanks to both the child and parent for taking the time out of their weekend to come hang out with us and join the party.
This year, I opted for buying hard plastic reflectors, some little stamps and a little package of colourful clay/play-dough.
It gets dark in Finland and even though there's now snow on the ground, reflectors are definitely a must!

V-Man was at overnight care for the past week so we picked up him and brought him to the party for a few hours and he survived happily with a balloon and platefuls of food for the first hour.
I was freaking impressed!  But once it got to be "too much" for him - too much sounds, squealing as kids chased each other and A-Man stealing his balloon - and the fact he kept trying to leave - that's when I realized he needed a break.
He needed to be alone and I respect that.  I brought my phone and let him watch his beloved Fröbelin Palikat on Youtube and he was much calmer almost immediately.  He was able to focus on the music and tune out the noise around him.

For food - I had finger foods because the party started at 2pm - it was after lunch and before supper.  Perfect time for finger foods - (mostly) healthy and light.
Fruit, veggies, nacho dip, some chips and had cupcakes and ice-cream sundaes (we just used extra paper cups for the sundaes...
Juices, teas and coffees with hot chocolate were readily available. 

There was so much food it didn't fit in the photo.

And because gummy tarantulas were on sale after Halloween, it was a perfect cupcake topper!

I baked regular chocolate cupcakes (low-lactose) and made some vanilla butter-cream frosting.  Then I crushed some Domino cookies (the Finnish equivalent of Oreo cookies) using a food processor and then dipped each cupcake in that and squished on a gummy tarantula - ta-da!

Chocolate cupcakes!

For decorations - I just bought a bag of balloons and at first filled them with too much air - so some were popping with barely any contact.  

I was sort of hoping it would start a friend's labour as she has only a couple weeks left... ;-)

We didn't have any games because A-Man can't seem to grasp rules or be able to sit still long enough, and V-Man wouldn't be too interested either - and of course M-Girl's too young - so we just let the kids run around with the balloons and jump around and they seemed to enjoy themselves.

Also, we had a big pad of craft paper and a box of markers for the kids to colour with and they seemed to enjoy it and proudly took home their artwork. :) 

When we pick up V-Man today, we'll let the kids open their presents together.  It didn't seem fair to let Ahti open them last night because V-Man went back to overnight care after the party and I think he needed the peace and quiet after such a busy party!

We had about 10 children altogether join us yesterday.

I do realize that my children have no idea what their birthdays mean and they don't quite get the concept of Christmas or any other holiday or holiday figure (i.e. Santa, Tooth Fairy etc.) - so I'm enjoying this while I can.
Before they get a little more demanding or requesting to NOT have a party together or a party at all.

And yes, M-Girl will probably have a little birthday party herself next year when she turns 1.  But it can probably tied into with mine as our birthdays are two weeks apart as well!  That and she seemed to handle the loads of attention, balloons (yes, even when they popped) and children running around her quite well.
And considering she can pull herself up to stand and dance in one spot - and move furniture around while walking - she'll probably be able to walk around by her 1st birthday too!

While we have lots of left overs that'll last us quite some time - I remember last year using up the vegetables in a stir-fry.  So I think for lunch - that's what we'll have! :D

BIMU

Life with Kids: Pee & Bread Crumbs

So, as you read about A-Man's screaming and peeing adventures in my last post, be happy to know I have more for you to read about.
And of course it involves A-Man and pee (and bread crumbs!).

Last night, I took him knitting with me and we had a good time!  I got a lot of knitting done (anything more than a round/row is considered a lot for me!), got to chat with friends and just relax.
The weirdest thing of the night was that A-Man didn't use the bathroom twice.  The first time - for some reason - his pants were on backwards and because they're sweat pants with a drawstring, those strings were hanging in the back.
And because he doesn't quite grasp the whole stand and pee thing - neither do I plan to teach him (I'll let SH do that when they're ready) - the drawstrings fell in the toilet without my knowledge.
So he's doing his business and I can smell pee.  When he hops off the toilet that's when I saw the drawstrings soaked in pee.  Great.
But it could've been worse!  The good thing out of this was that he was wearing splash pants, so I removed his sweat pants, tossed them in my backpack outer pocket and put his splash pants back on and that was that.
Before we left, I asked him repeatedly if he needed to use the bathroom.

"No.  Ei.  Noooooooooo!" was the response I was given.
Fine.  We went to the grocery store to pick up a couple bits and pieces and went home.
We were 10 seconds from our door outside and he peed himself.
Filled his lined rubber boots with puddles.  Yay.

We got upstairs, got cleaned up, went to bed and all was well.

Until 3:30 this morning.  Oh yes.  My lovely dog woke me up by scratching himself so hard while on the floor, that he was kicking our bed frame and shaking me like wild.
Oh and then A-Man soaked the bed and the protective sheet I have under the regular bed sheet had shifted.
So again, my poor brand new mattress smells like pee.
I'm not happy.

Then to top it off - he started to protest wearing a diaper.  And by "protest" it starts with a bit of "no" then turns very quickly into screaming and screeching his head off and waking everyone up.
I stripped the bed and whispered/screamed how angry I was.

By this point, I'm so exhausted that I'm wide awake.  So I got the kids buns because that's the most I can handle - at 3:45 in the morning - and suddenly my bed is caked in bed crumbs.  Really.

I used to think crumbs in the bed was THE worst thing to litter a bed and never ate in bed...except when I was hiding away from the kids with ice-cream...
Then I discovered toddlers wetting the bed...which is 2nd to dogs or kids barfing in bed.

V-Man decides he's a champ.  He wants nothing more than to jump on the bed and watch his favourite music on my phone.
I say sure- because it wasn't HIS fault he was woken up from a nice deep slumber.  So I let him have my phone with the volume on low and by 5:30am - I was outside with the dogs.  SH wasn't pleased but it really wasn't his fault he got woken up and not his fault he can't fall back asleep.
He stayed up until it was time to go to day-care and as the taxi was pulling up our drive-way - then decides that he'd like to go back home and sleep.
Tough cookies on that one.

Thankfully, A-Man and M-Girl managed to get another 2 hours nap in before the morning really started and I managed a light 15-20 minutes myself.
I was perky and excited for the boys to go to day-care, the dogs had already gone out, I had my bowl of Greek yoghurt with granola cereal and honey...and just wanted to squeeze in an episode of Glee (season 4 - no spoilers please!) before crashing.

I must've looked like death because the day-care staff asked if I was okay...oh boy.

Anyways, I did just that.  I took A-Man to day-care, power-walked home, had a bit more breakfast, watched the first episode, did some laundry and dishes and plunked myself into bed with M-Girl and we were out for a solid 3-hours. 

So one massive tantrum downtown after day-care today and I'm done.
Completely with a Finnish little old lady telling me what to do and to not cover his mouth as he screams the roof off that the whole bus stop commuters can hear (it's a block long-ish) and trying to shame me because he's not wearing mittens (his choice and he constantly rips them off otherwise) and even when he threw his hat at her (which is a kinder version of what I wanted to do by this point) - she still kept nagging.

Oh and he doesn't eat dinner at all.  He prefers the likes of crackers and yoghurt - anything really that ISN'T supper...so I'm going to be buying this book soon.  I already have Adam Mansbach's other book "Go the F*ck to Sleep!"

Alright, I'm out for the night - hopefully a deep and boring/quiet one.
BIMU

PS Turns out my neighbour's child also wet the bed last night (her protective sheet is better than mine) and when she told her child about A-Man doing the same, the child thought this was hilarious.
We don't.

Life With Kids: Why I Shop Second-Hand

I figured I'd start a chapter in my blog (which will have it's own tag line on the side under "The Common Ones") about "Life With Kids" - to help those interested in kid-friendly/specific posts.

So!  Shopping second-hand.

I LOVE IT.

In Canada, second-hand shopping is okay at Value Village and online and lately, through volunteer-run Facebook pages based on the area you live in.

Oh and fleamarkets or garage sales are still super popular.

Coming to Finland five years ago - we bought a lot of stuff for the V-Man from H&M because I didn't know my way around the city, didn't know of the fabulous second-hand stores that are scattered around the city and my Finnish language skills simply did not exist.

H&M has sales regularly and after a year and a half - I discovered a second-hand shop that was a 15-minutes walk from home.  Perfect!

So, I understand that shopping second-hand for things isn't everyone's cup of tea but rest assured, in Scandinavia - it's totally acceptable and fine!

What do I look for?

• Clothes/footwear: for myself, the kids and rarely for the husband (although I did find him like-new dressy Ecco winter boots the other day for a fab price!) because he doesn't care for used clothing.  
• Cloth diapers -  as long as they're not terribly stained - why not?!
• Movies:  Now that we have 3 children, date nights to the movie theater are slim to none and that's alright because everything comes out to DVD or bluray eventually!
• Glass animal figurines:  I collect miniature glass animals and because it's a dying art - they're hard to find!
• Moomin mugs:  Again, I collect.
• Kitchen utensils: We got a huge box of dishes when we moved from a friend - so I just keep an eye for little things like baking utensils, pans and so on.  (I'm not allowed buying anymore "machines" because I now own a food processor/mixer, a blender, a bread-making machine, a juicer and a deep-fryer - all second--hand!)
• Lunch containers:  I love taking the kids to the playground in the summer and bringing snacks/lunch with us - because it's healthier, cheaper and convenient for me to have food on hand at all times too!  Plus I'm hoping to go back to school too myself - so I love bringing lunch with me.
• Stuff for the dogs:  Because they're family too! :)

Of course when needed - furniture, outdoor equipment if I'm lucky (found a brand new Deuter Kids Comfort III carrier for the kids for 20€ few years ago... ) and whatever else we may need.

But WHY second-hand shop?

• Save money: If the price is right - you can save quite a lot.  Whether it be on something not available in Finland and someone who has travelled bought the item abroad or online - you'd be saving on transport or shipping fees and hopefully off of the original price.
• Help the environment: Yep - this is one that I like a lot!  I can bring my own bags to the second-hand store for one - so I don't have to be issued a plastic bag!  Also, if the item you buy isn't still in its original packaging - then that's less waste for you to toss out!
• Charity or finance a person/family:  Many of the second-hand shops in Finland are ran by a team of people but the table you purchase from is being rented from someone getting rid of their junk/stuff.  So the seller rents the table for X amount of weeks but the prices on the tags are usually for an individual and the money goes straight back to them.
  Also, there are charity shops - so the prices you see - is the money that goes straight to charity.
• Growing like weeds: Children grow in a blink of an eye so I see no point in paying a ridiculous amount of money for clothing that they're not going to wear for a very long time.  Foot wear especially!
• I'm a collector:  Original prices on things and items that are no longer produced can add up!  So if I happen to find a Moomin mug cheaper than in the shops in excellent condition or a glass mini animal figurine - then I'm happy to add to my collection. 

Do you shop second-hand?
BIMU

PS Here's a handy link for those in Finland! It's a site with a list of all the kirpputori (second-hand shops) around your city.