A Side of Autism: Seat Belts

I have a digibox - the thing in Finland that ensures you get cable and you can update the channel packages you want accordingly.
I just don't have it set up.
I truly think that my life is something like a reality tv show and if TLC is interested - they're more than welcome to visit and film my family in Finland.

A couple days ago this is what happened:

I woke up and didn't have breakfast.  I ran out with the dogs for about 20 minutes and brought them back in, packed up my stuff into a backpack and dragged the V-Man downstairs for his taxi.
He sat down and I buckled him in and then he immediately freaked out.  He absolutely refused to wear a seat belt or stay seated in the taxi.
You've got to be kidding me! I thought to myself - seeing as the A-Man's been ill for nearly a week and it was supposed to be my first day back to school.
Well, I ended up running back upstairs, getting my stuff and rushing to take M-Girl to day-care AND V-Man by bus after that.
He was fantastic waiting for the bus and waiting for me to un-dress his sister and toss her into her day-care group.
He wasn't so thrilled when we got downtown and had to wait 3 minutes for the next bus to take him to day-care.  Nope - he wasn't having it.
Then when we took the bus to his day-care - I slipped and pulled something in my knee and he continued to launch himself into a snow bank.
And not just any snow bank.  But of course - a yellow one.  Yeah - not impressed.  By this point - I'm in tears.
He recognizes I'm stressed out a bit and sobbing and decides he should not move and assumes his famous boulder position.  GREAT.
We eventually make it to the street to cross and half-way across the road he decides now is the perfect time to just not move again.
Bear in mind, I am carrying a heavy backpack with my stuff, his back pack on my back AND his car seat so he can come home via taxi that afternoon.  And my other hand is holding his while attempting to drag him.
The day-care gladly takes him in and calms me down and I'm rushing off to go to school...

Is that a post truck swerving in my direction?
Of course it is.  I jump like a mad woman into a non-yellow snow bank and wait until it passes then promptly dial the husband and begin to BAWL my head off like a kid who didn't get a lollipop from the doctor.

I make it to school and all goes fine.  My phone's nearly dead but that's alright.
I get home, toss my phone on the charger, have a bite to eat and at 3pm promptly go downstairs to wait for the V-Man via taxi.
Thankfully SH is home because my phone was charging and guess what?
The V-Man refused to sit in the taxi buckled up on the home again.

This is the first time that he's refused to sit in a taxi on the way home from day-care.  But this is the 4th time within 2 years (3 being this school year alone!) that he's refused to stay in a taxi.
By "stay in a taxi" - I mean the drivers put the child safety lock on the doors for a reason.  Because he removes the seat belt and slips out of it and proceeds to scream, cry, jump or run in the back seat of the taxi.

I'm not allowed to go with him to or from day-care - so now this is a big problem.
The day-care reached out to the social worker and they'll be switching taxi companies and putting the V-Man in a special kind of taxi that has harnesses in place of regular seat belts.

Because again yesterday morning, I watched him and he ignored the driver, climbed in quite happily but as soon as I put the seat belt on - even putting the chest cross strap behind him - he freaked.
So we're thinking that he was in a taxi (seeing as we don't have a car) and either the driver pinched him by accident while putting the seat belt on (yep even in a snow suit it may be possible) or had to suddenly hit the brakes and the belt would've tightened and that may have terrified him.

So it's safe to say - my 5-year old is terrified of seat belts and cars.
But buses are just fine.

A-Man is done his virus and now V-Man has it.
Yay.
BIMU

PS You can read here why my son gets a taxi to and from day-care in Finland.

Learning About Finland: The Winter Holiday Edition

Here is a list of almost everything I can think of that is related to winter and Finland.
Ready?

1. It can be really cold - especially in northern Finland!
1. It can be extra dark outside when there isn't any snow - be sure to take vitamin D!
2. Make sure you wear layers.
3. Make sure you moisturize - the dryness can really damage skin and cracked skin isn't pleasant for anyone.
4. Be sure to have a reflector on your coat or bag.  At least a couple...
5. Walking a dog or cat?  Same goes for them and yes, people walk cats in Finland.
6. If there's snow on the ground or by December 1st - it's mandatory to have winter/snow tires (depends on what term you want to use) if you have a car.
2. Shops are closed on:
1. 6th of December for Finnish Independence Day (some small shops like Sale or Siwa may be opened).
2. 24th of December - Christmas Eve - by 12pm.  Buses in JKL at least, are done driving at 1pm.
3. 25th of December - Christmas Day - all day.
4. 26th of December - Boxing Day to North Americans - all day. Some smaller shops may be opened.
5. 31st of December - New Year's Eve -Fireworks are allowed to be set off from 6pm-about 2am.
6.  1st of January - New Year's Day
7. 6th of January - Epiphany - also the day where everyone tosses away their Christmas tree.  So do be careful and look up - so one doesn't fall on you.  It's much easier to toss a tree over your balcony than drag it down the stairs.
3. Christmas
1.  If you're shipping packages - do so as early as possible because the line ups can be quite long and tedious.  Bring a book for while you're waiting.
2. You can hire a Santa to come deliver presents and sing songs with your children but it can be pricey!  You can even find advertisements for "sober Santas with own vehicle"....
1. With that said, yes - children see Santa on Christmas Eve and generally presents are opened on that day too. 
3. There is even a Santa's village in Lapland! 
1. Sorry, he is not considered from the North Pole. 
4. Finnish Christmas food is typically ham (a massive roasted piece of pork), vegetable casseroles (that quite often look like baby food), glöggi (drink it warm and never heat it in a water kettle!  Or be freaky like me and drink it cold or mix some 7Up in there for a cold fizzy drink!), joulutorttu (Christmas tart - a star-shaped flaky pastry with plum jam in the center) and Christmas porridge in the morning.  If you get the almond in the Christmas porridge - it's said to be very lucky. :)
5. Santa's are usually in the bigger grocery stores and sometimes a mall - there doesn't seem to be a photography service included.  Be sure to bring your own camera or use your cell phone.
6. It's alright to get a real Christmas tree - even in apartment buildings! (In Canada there tends to be more restrictions.)
1. It's illegal to just go out and chop down a tree wherever you please.
7. Finns don't do Christmas stockings - so they might be hard to come by.  You're better off making your own or using a real sock! :)
4. New Year's Eve
1. Don't drink and drive - it's illegal here too.
2. Fireworks may be publicly set off from 6pm-2am in Finland.  Your city will have ones at midnight to welcome in the new year.  The reason for allowing them so early - is for those with children who don't want to keep their children awake so late.  Best to walk the terrified dogs beforehand if you can!
3. You may get some tin metal horse shoes....and according to Finns - you melt them in a pot of boiling water then toss them in the snow or somewhere cold and whatever shape they take determines your following year.  Friend of mine got one that looked like sperm...still hasn't had a baby and this was 3 years ago at least.

As usual - I'm super late getting this out and posted. 
Well, happy holidays!  I'm back to cleaning and cooking - as we're going to celebrate Christmas tomorrow with friends visiting! :)

Happy Holidays!
BIMU

Learning About Finland: Move Over Helsinki!

Ah Helsinki, the capital of Finland.
Also noted as one of the "most honest cities for returning a wallet".

Well, you can move over now Helsinki - I want to put Jyväskylä on the map of honest cities.
Friday, October 31st - I lost my wallet.
I was planning to take my A-Man to day-care via bus, as we have the monthly un-limited usage cards and because he enjoys "paying" for the bus (taking my wallet and pressing it on the electronic panel) and saying "MOI!" to the driver everyday.
And he equally loves waving good-bye to the bus when we get off and telling it "HEI HEI" (good-bye) and often tells it to be a good boy.
But that particular Friday he wanted to go "bizzy".  He wanted me to bike him to day-care.
Fine - I forget what I had for dinner the night before, but I'm sure I need to lose a bit of flub anyway.  So off we go - orange wallet in the basket and down the hills.
I remembered bringing my wallet into the day-care and I don't remember bringing it out of the day-care.
So I went insane that day trying to find my wallet.  I even went back to the day-care twice to look for it and back my 30-minutes hiking route I had taken with the dogs - nothing.  I was exhausted.
But no money was taken, my residence permit wasn't inside my wallet - just a whole bunch of other stuff.
Like what? (I know you're curious).

• Library card
• Finnish ID card - extremely handy (and expensive!) so I don't have to tote around my passport.
• Pictures of my children
• Kela cards - mine and my 3 children's cards too
• Subway card and other little membership/discount cards

Well, I wrote about what to do if you lose your wallet in Finland and only posted it this morning.
I figured I'd write a proper update and perhaps clarify why Jyväskylä needs to be named a super honest city too.

I went to the library this morning and paid 2€ for a new library card.
I'll miss my blue and white one but I love going to the library and taking the kids there too.  I also enjoy borrowing their wide selection of books and movies - it's a really great library!
(OOOH! And if you have a city library card in Jyväskylä, you can use your card to get into 4 museums for free on any day of the week from the beginning of November until end of January 2015!)
So I now have the new animal-printed one.
I told the lady that I needed a new card and thankfully had 2€ in change and my passport with me.  I advised her that I lost my wallet a couple weeks ago and she confirmed that nothing had been taken out on my card and no fees were owed.  Great!
"Oh that's unfortunate you lost your wallet." - librarian
"Yeah it's my first time having to report everything missing - ever." -me
"Oh really?! It's your first time?  Oh wow that's really something!" - her
Yep it was - that or she thinks I'm much older than what I am and I'm really impressing the pants off of her.
After that, I moved on to gander around the yarn shop with a friend then meet up with another friend and gossip and have McDonald's for lunch (we're classy like that).
As friend 2 and I parted ways, she suggested that I check the police station anyways because why not?
I was planning to go to Kela afterward and replacing my Kela card (along with the kids') and thought, I have time - why not?

I walked into the police station and the same two ladies were working there and I got the same one who didn't ask me to file a police report or anything a week and a half ago.
This is going to be a waste of my time...was my initial thought.
Well!  I walked up to the lady and showed her my current wallet - which is the same model but "caramel" coloured and told her:

"I was here a week and a half ago - any chance this wallet but orange and full of stuff is here?"

She looked at me and said, "One moment."

WELL! That was promising within itself!  She didn't flat out say "no".  She even went out back and talked with someone and came back...with my little orange wallet in her hand.
My jaw smacked the desk with shock and relief!
She opened it and went through it until she found my Finnish ID card and confirmed my ID that way and I was thrilled. 

For whatever reason, I suppose we'll call it "extra safety measure", the police officer beside her questioned her in just giving me back my wallet - of course in Finnish...then the lady helping me confirmed to her that she's looking at my Finnish identification card and yep - it's really the owner of the wallet.

I was so thankful and happy - I didn't even ask where it was found or when it was brought in - because she did tell me last time that someone would call me...nobody did by the way...

Anyways, I took a gander through my wallet once I left and everything was there.
There was actually  more than I remembered:

• Tapestry needles for sewing knitted projects
• SD memory card full of photos
• More than 2€ in coins - I didn't count but it might've been closer to 3.50€-ish.
• Other bits and bobs...

This is the first time that I lost something "huge" or "extremely important" - so I'm really grateful for the stranger that found my wallet and brought it back to the police. 
I've lost mittens, my friend has lost her backpack which contained her most important documents (visa, passport etc.) on a bus in Jyväskylä...

So I vote - Jyväskylä for the "Most Likely To Get Your Stuff Returned To You City**".
Thank you so much again stranger and if you're reading this - I'd love to buy you a coffee.
More importantly, thank you Finland for allowing me to show the world how awesome of a country you are.  And I'm honoured to call Jyväskylä my home.

BIMU 

** Unless your bike isn't locked properly or your lock sucks.  Some exceptions may apply. 

Learning About Finland: Losing Your Wallet

Have you ever lost your wallet?  Well, Finland is probably the best country to lose it in.
Helsinki is listed as the "World's Most Honest City" during a dropped wallet test.

Here's some things you need to consider if your wallet is truly lost (or stolen) and immediate action should take place if you cannot find it.

1. Cancel your bank cards and credit cards or at least drop the limits for spending to 0€ if you think you'll find your wallet fairly soon.
1. It costs 10€ per card to get them replaced.
2. Check online (if you didn't stick your internet banking codes in that same wallet) if anyone's used your bank card and if there's any money un-accounted for.
3. Once they're filed as lost - you are no longer responsible for any money spent on those cards (or attempted).  If you don't file your cards as lost until later - and money has been spent without your knowledge or approval - you're more than likely still responsible.
4. You can do this individually by calling your banks or online or dialing 020333.  This is 1 number and you can list all bank cards, credit cards and other important information that was in the wallet.
2. File a police report.  
3. Re-order the following (if they were in your wallet):
1. Residence Permit - I never carry this because it's not a valid piece of identification anyway.  Unless I have to present it to the
2. ID card or drivers license
3. Kela card
4. Passport (also reach out to your embassy if this was included wit your things gone missing)
5. Bus card - if you know the card number (printed on the back of the bus card or on the receipts from the last time you re-loaded it) - the bus station can cancel your card so it cannot be used by someone else.  Then it can be confiscated if used by someone else and hopefully if that's the case, you can get it back.  If not - then you'll have to order a new one.
1. Based on JKL Linkki bus system.
6. City or university library card(s)
7. Insurance or travel insurance cards
8. Membership cards (i.e. gym)

Those are the most major items I can think of...oh I bet you're wondering where this came up and why I would blog about it eh?

Yep, 2 weeks ago (as of this Friday) I took my child to day-care and normally A-Man is cool with the bus.  But no.  He decided that Friday he had to go "bizzy".  Which apparently meant bicycle.
So we did that and between the day-care and home (a straight line) - I managed to lose my wallet.  I don't remember leaving the daycare with it but I know it went inside with me.
We've checked the flat up and down and inside-out - no wallet. 

So I went to the police station (fat load of help that did) and because it was a Friday afternoon and I squeezed in the door 5-minutes before closing time and because there was a complete jerk at the other end of the counter hawking up a hair ball or the biggest bucket of phlegm ever...and he was also screaming at the police officer...
I quickly asked her if anyone has dropped off an orange wallet - nope. 
"But my Finnish ID is in there - do I cancel it or what do I do?" -me desperate and caked in sweat as I ran from the bus stop downtown.
"If we find it - we'll call you."

Clearly she had Friday night plans that started as soon as the office was closed to the public...she didn't ask my name or offer to file a report.
Thanks a lot.

Anyways, I'll be going back today in the hopes that it's possibly there and they were terrified of the bulkiness of my wallet (lots of membership cards and crap in there) to take a peek inside...

Lesson learned?
Don't listen to the toddler.  Had I not been "bizzy" (bicycling) - I wouldn't have lost my wallet.

BIMU

This was originally started on Halloween 2014 - when I lost my wallet.
Guess what??  I got it back.  I'll do a separate post soon!

Learning About Finland: Fröbelin Palikat

Not all music in Finland is heavy metal.
In fact, one very popular band here is a children's band made up of 4 men: a drummer, two guitarists and a keyboard player.
When I was starting to learn Finnish, one song we were introduced to was "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes" - but the Finnish version - courtesy of Fröbelin Palikat on Youtube.
You can find their official site (Finnish only) here.
And you can find information about their band in English via Wikipedia here.

Now, never did I think about that music video until recently. 
I've mentioned before that V-Man goes to overnight care and they try to take him outside and go for nature walks, to the playgrounds and occasionally swimming and grocery shopping.  But when the weather is crummy or he has to wait a bit for his food - they'll allow him to watch a Fröbelin Palikat DVD and he seems to be quite happy, entertained and calm.
Fröbelin Palikat's music videos on Youtube have saved us from many melt-downs and tantrums while waiting to pay for groceries or the bus!!
So I began to keep an eye out at second-hand stores for their DVDs and they're really quite hard to find.  Then I tried looking in stores and same thing.
Looks like the children that do have those DVDs were holding onto them very tightly and the shops didn't have any interest in selling DVDs from an old 90's band anymore - with the likes of newer movies and American movies dubbed into Finnish becoming more and more popular.
Although, they do have a new live performances DVD out!
But then one day in Prisma, I did find some of their DVDs and I bought as many as I could with the intention of gifting them to the V-Man for Christmas and his birthday.

About a month ago, as I was scrolling through my Facebook news feed, I noticed a local shop - Kimperi - had posted a photo of a sign of the Fröbelin Palikat logo.
Excited, I translated what was going on and it turned out that FP was coming to Jyväskylä and having a concert.  Tickets were available immediately for 12€ per person (babies under the age of 12 months got free admittance) and the concert was being held in a local school's gymnasium.
And it's being held on the week of the V-Man's big 0-5.
What a perfect birthday gift for the child who wants nothing!
SH agreed with the gift idea and I got excited.  Like embarassing fan-girl excited.
I liked them on their Facebook page, and started thinking about how excited V-Man will be.

Well, we picked up V-Man from overnight care and it turns out that he's been awake since 5am this morning and not showing any signs of slowing down.
FYI it's 10:54pm and he's still wide awake.  
I bought the tickets the first day they went on sale and had them tucked safely into my new wallet (will discuss this later) and no, it's not a FP wallet. :)

Of course all three of the children decided to not take a nap today but I didn't care.  I knew with certainty, that once we got there - the kids wouldn't dream of taking a nap or throwing a fit.
I was partially right.
 
Well, the concert was held at a local school, so when you walked in (we arrived 30-minutes early) everyone was un-dressing their children and themselves from their outdoor gear and shoes and making their way into the gymnasium.  You were able to purchase tickets at the door and if you had yours already, they ripped off the stubs when you enter the gym.

There were tables at the back of the gym, opposite the stage, that offered snacks and beverages for sale - along with Fröbelin Palikat "swag" (merchandise).
I knew I wanted to get something for the kids but decided we'd make our purchases at the end of the show and focused more on getting to the front of the gym as possible.
This way, we wouldn't have to chase V-Man down and away from the stage and block other people's view.
We had an excellent spot to the side of the stage and full view and of course the kids kept inching forward during the show.
V-Man even got a special little wave and wink from the lead guitarist/singer!!
I'm such a sap I got teary-eyed and immediately sent a message to my friend...oh I'll keep the tears at bay...keep reading!

The performance was about an hour long (included one encore performance) and as soon as the show was over - everyone rushed to the back of the gym for some CDs, DVDs, hats/balaclavas/winter hats or t-shirts and while we were packing up - we noticed that many parents were quickly rushing to the stage (behind the rope).
"Hmm, let's see what's going on up here." I suggested and that's what we did.

Well, colour me surprised and in awe.
The band members of Fröbelin Palikat had fat stacks of cards with their band photo on it performing, and they each had pens in their hands.
And they each autographed above their heads in the photo for every single child or parent who wanted it.

We let A-Man run around in circles in the gym, as many other children were too - and I was carrying M-Girl and we brought V-Man to meet each member.  Of course I couldn't go completely fan-girl on them and get all teary eyed about how I thought this was super nice of them and how V-Man is autistic and loves their music to the moon and back...but we at least got something that I can put into his baby book (since he's the biggest fan) and I hope a lifelong memory for him.

This was truly a fantastic family experience for us and I honestly didn't think it would be possible to take our special guy to a "concert" anywhere - and even with the nasty tantrums afterward from A-Man - this was truly worth it.
And we picked up a couple t-shirts for the boys and a towel and were able to pay with our bank card (which surprised SH).

Dear Fröbelin Palikat:

I cannot thank you enough for performing in Jyväskylä - right before my son's 5th birthday and I wanted you to know that you made him the happiest little boy in the whole world.
Because he has severe autism - he's not the easiest child to shop for and while this was also our first concert ever in Finland - I hope you'll come back to Jyväskylä in the future because he really is your number one fan.
Sincerely,
V-Man's Mom

PS sorry he was the only kid standing during most of your "sitting down songs" and tried to get up on the stage once...

Learning About Finland: "He's mentally retarded."

Ah - the lovely "R-word".

Retard.
Retarded.
Retardation.

A few months ago, I was downtown and got a phone call from a doctor at the hospital who informed me that I will get a notice in the mail regarding our following appointment for V-Man's diagnosis of autism.
Up until this past summer - he was only diagnosed as "having characteristics of autism" because they didn't know what level of severity it was or how it would develop in the future.
He was also two-years old when we started doing tests and having assessments at the hospital for him.
So right away it was clearly obvious that V-Man was autistic but how much - not yet sure.

Then this past summer, while I'm downtown waiting for the bus, carrying a baby and a crap-ton of groceries - I get a phone call from that doctor and this was our conversation pretty much:

• "Hi, it's Doctor So and So.  Is this a bad time to talk about V-Man's diagnosis?"
• "Nope - what is it?"
• "Well, he's definitely autistic and mentally retarded."

The air kind of escaped my body like a punch in the guts.
What the F does that mean?!

So this was my response after a brief but noticeable pause:

"Okay."  (I'm clearly learning the way of the Finns! HA.)

I was fighting back tears because I'm at a bus stop among strangers and not quite sure how to take this all in and the doctor was a bit surprised.

"You didn't know about this?  I told your husband that this is a strong possibility...he didn't say anything?"
"Nope - not that I'm aware of."

So she confirms when the next appointment will be and that if I have any questions to feel free to call her.

As soon as I got home, I cried.  I know it can be always worse - I know it and I preach it.
But it still was a shock and I didn't know how to react - so I cried.
Then I stuffed myself with the forbidden chips and ice-cream until the husband got home from work.
Then I quietly cooked a meal without so much as a peep.
When the kids were asleep then I opened my floodgates again and let SH have it.
In all fairness, in case he ever reads this - he defended himself with:

"Mental retardation just means that V-Man's delayed in learning - even basic everyday things.  A developmental delay - which often goes with autism.  We knew that.  It's just a different way of saying it."

I went to the hospital for that meeting a month later and the doctor went over everything on her paper but her main focus was my face.
Not that I had a ginormous zit or anything - but moreso that I was so calm about the whole thing.  (Remember - I did all my crying about a paragraph back/month prior! :) )
But once the words "Your son is showing signs of mental retardation..." - the translator stepped in and shockingly, corrected her.

Sure - medically - the term "retarded" is correct.
However, it didn't seem to appear that Finns are aware of the negative usage of the "R-Word".
The doctor was shocked, apologetic and made a mental note to not use the term "retarded" - so as to not offend other parents (probably ones who wouldn't be nearly as calm as I).

 It's typical in North America as an example to ignorantly say, "You're retarded!  That's so retarded!  What a retard!"

I know - because I'm guilty of growing up hearing that (home, school, everywhere!) and saying that everywhere.

It was only until I got my first "professional" job at a bank did I kick that word out of my vocabulary.  I developed a deep friendship with one of my very best friend's who has Cerebral Palsy and out of respect for her and the fact that it was very rude and hateful to use that word (in my opinion) anyways.
She's the first person I e-mailed and the first one with such a wise and calm response:

"Don't worry.  Labels are for cans.  Not people."


To have V-Man diagnosed with "Autism characteristics" - would never make me think of anyone referring to him as a "retard" - but rather as a kid who's acting weird and has autism.
But now that he has that diagnosis - I was upset.  I sent e-mails and messages to my closest friends I felt comfortable telling and while all were Canadian - many were shocked at the doctor's "casual usage" of the words.
But she was right.  It is a medical condition, it's her professional diagnosis and it's true.
He's far behind in his extremely basic developmental skills and with him not speaking - it's hard to say what he'll be like next year, in 5 years, in 10 or 20 years from now.
But we'll see how things go.   :)

And for those who were wondering what's the latest and greatest hospital/doctor assessment update about the V-Man - well, this is it. :)
It doesn't make me love him any less - if anything - I love him a little more.  I can't imagine the things that go through his mind and I consider him our little trooper because our other two children seem to not be showing any signs of autism or being mentally challenged in any way.

BIMU

PS I do have some friends that use the R-Word recreationally, so to speak, and no - I don't take offense to it when you use it.  I haven't used it myself in such a long time - it's almost like hearing/reading a foreign language whenever someone does use it.
Nor am I intending for this post to offend anyone in any way.

Learning About Finland: Baby Showers Are Few & Far Between

The term "Baby Shower" does not actually refer to the washing of the child or the tears...nope, not even the golden shower you might get occasionally (typical with boys) or the brown/green/black/mustard coloured splatter either.

In North America, a baby shower is the chance to shower the un-born baby and quite pregnant (or expecting - aka adopting or other alternative) mother with gifts, love, food and attention.
Usually the work place, Church, close friends and/or family would host one and quite often it's a surprise.
There's usually light finger foods, some games, prizes, sharing of birth stories or advice (especially for the first-time mothers) and that's that.

In Finland - it doesn't quite exist yet...
If you're an expat and living in Finland - don't be surprised if you don't get thrown a lovely gathering of friends, a pile of gifts and a stuffed tummy of food before your up-coming due date.
It's just coming to Finland in bits and pieces and typically most Finns don't name their child until they've met the baby and decide on a date for a "Naming Party" (often tied in with a christening or baptism).
That seems to be the prime time to meet the baby, congratulate the parents and the older siblings and bring a gift.
The only baby showers I have been to in Finland have been organized for those that are expats or know about baby showers because they have lots of expat friends or they're half Finnish.
Finnish men seem to have something called a "Little Toes Party" which involves getting dragged out and completely wasted for their "last time".

Today, my knitting group and I threw a triple baby shower.
Oh yeah - we went there.  We have three ladies all pregnant  (okay one had her baby last month) and all in agreement to having one baby shower together.
We picked a date, decided on potluck and trickily thought of three different gifts to get each expectant mother that would (hopefully) compliment her taste and style.
Oh yeah, and all three ladies were having boys.
We had the party at the mother who had her baby boy about a month ago's home and it was spacious, welcoming and it gave most of us a chance to see her new home. :)
Each of us brought a dish of food of some sort to share and we started with food because with all the wonderful smells coming from the kitchen/living room (it's connected) - it's hard not to resist on snacking here and there!
Once the food was done, we played some games.
We had a baby food tasting game (4 baby food jars with the labels removed and you had to guess what was in them by looks, smells and taste if you wished), memory game (20 items related to baby or child and after 5-minutes - you had to write down what you remembered) and charades.
Charades is a game where you draw a word or sentence and have to act it out silently so the others (or your team if the group is divided) can guess what you're trying to portray.
Funny enough, one of the expecting mothers drew the word "Delivery" and she got really into it, dropped down on the floor and imitated giving birth!!
I've never seen this done at a baby shower before but it was really funny and a hit (I think).  Definitely recommended!
For gifts I just ran into the grocery store and picked up random small sized chocolate or candy bars.  Simple and lots of variety for people to choose from. :)
Because we're a crafting group, it made sense to make/find gifts for the mothers that were unique to them.

• For the one who had the baby already - we each crocheted or knitted a square and shortened his name to 3 letters and knitted that into 3 squares and he now has a personalized blanket.
• For the one who technically lives in another city now and had to take the train back in a couple days - we didn't want to laden her down with a lot of heavy stuff and she had 2 simple requests.  Nothing blue and hooded towels.
• So we got terry cloth fabric, two of the ladies made 1 towel and some wash cloths to match. 
• We also each bought some cotton yarn, as she's a crochet fanatic and it was  all wrapped up in the shape of a pram for her.  And a little notebook to write patterns down too.
• The third was the trickiest.  We knew she has a nephew in her native country and a nephew here in Finland from her husband's side - so clothing was obviously not necessary. That and she's a knitting machine (and regularly designs her own patterns) and quickly becoming a sewing machine too.
• Ideas we had for her (that were quickly cancelled because she ended up receiving/buying or making them herself:
• Baby carrier
• Pram
• Scrapbook or baby record book
• We then decided on something she could never predict - nor her mother in-law or mother!  A little library for the baby.  We each brought our favourite childhood stories and the baby and parents will have loads to read in both Finnish and English. :)

Also, a friend in the group also made some hand-made soaps and pampering body-butters for the mothers based on their favourite scents.  And another member who couldn't make created some lovely personalized bookmarks.
Actually, you can check them out here in her Etsy shop - along with lots of other fantastic things like post cards, folded cards, calendars and the like!
Mostly dog-themed ;).

Then we had dessert and chit chat around the table!!
Fairly relaxed and some of us managed to get a bit of knitting done too.

I'll write a separate blog post about ideas for baby showers and how to go about setting it up!
Until next time!
BIMU

Life With Kids: Why I Shop Second-Hand

I figured I'd start a chapter in my blog (which will have it's own tag line on the side under "The Common Ones") about "Life With Kids" - to help those interested in kid-friendly/specific posts.

So!  Shopping second-hand.

I LOVE IT.

In Canada, second-hand shopping is okay at Value Village and online and lately, through volunteer-run Facebook pages based on the area you live in.

Oh and fleamarkets or garage sales are still super popular.

Coming to Finland five years ago - we bought a lot of stuff for the V-Man from H&M because I didn't know my way around the city, didn't know of the fabulous second-hand stores that are scattered around the city and my Finnish language skills simply did not exist.

H&M has sales regularly and after a year and a half - I discovered a second-hand shop that was a 15-minutes walk from home.  Perfect!

So, I understand that shopping second-hand for things isn't everyone's cup of tea but rest assured, in Scandinavia - it's totally acceptable and fine!

What do I look for?

• Clothes/footwear: for myself, the kids and rarely for the husband (although I did find him like-new dressy Ecco winter boots the other day for a fab price!) because he doesn't care for used clothing.  
• Cloth diapers -  as long as they're not terribly stained - why not?!
• Movies:  Now that we have 3 children, date nights to the movie theater are slim to none and that's alright because everything comes out to DVD or bluray eventually!
• Glass animal figurines:  I collect miniature glass animals and because it's a dying art - they're hard to find!
• Moomin mugs:  Again, I collect.
• Kitchen utensils: We got a huge box of dishes when we moved from a friend - so I just keep an eye for little things like baking utensils, pans and so on.  (I'm not allowed buying anymore "machines" because I now own a food processor/mixer, a blender, a bread-making machine, a juicer and a deep-fryer - all second--hand!)
• Lunch containers:  I love taking the kids to the playground in the summer and bringing snacks/lunch with us - because it's healthier, cheaper and convenient for me to have food on hand at all times too!  Plus I'm hoping to go back to school too myself - so I love bringing lunch with me.
• Stuff for the dogs:  Because they're family too! :)

Of course when needed - furniture, outdoor equipment if I'm lucky (found a brand new Deuter Kids Comfort III carrier for the kids for 20€ few years ago... ) and whatever else we may need.

But WHY second-hand shop?

• Save money: If the price is right - you can save quite a lot.  Whether it be on something not available in Finland and someone who has travelled bought the item abroad or online - you'd be saving on transport or shipping fees and hopefully off of the original price.
• Help the environment: Yep - this is one that I like a lot!  I can bring my own bags to the second-hand store for one - so I don't have to be issued a plastic bag!  Also, if the item you buy isn't still in its original packaging - then that's less waste for you to toss out!
• Charity or finance a person/family:  Many of the second-hand shops in Finland are ran by a team of people but the table you purchase from is being rented from someone getting rid of their junk/stuff.  So the seller rents the table for X amount of weeks but the prices on the tags are usually for an individual and the money goes straight back to them.
  Also, there are charity shops - so the prices you see - is the money that goes straight to charity.
• Growing like weeds: Children grow in a blink of an eye so I see no point in paying a ridiculous amount of money for clothing that they're not going to wear for a very long time.  Foot wear especially!
• I'm a collector:  Original prices on things and items that are no longer produced can add up!  So if I happen to find a Moomin mug cheaper than in the shops in excellent condition or a glass mini animal figurine - then I'm happy to add to my collection. 

Do you shop second-hand?
BIMU

PS Here's a handy link for those in Finland! It's a site with a list of all the kirpputori (second-hand shops) around your city.

The Birthday Gift That Involved The Police

Yesterday I decided to bring A-Man with me to go birthday gift shopping for a party we're attending today.
The theme was "woodland animals".  I was stuck and had never met the child while he was awake for very long (he's turning 1) and not in a long time because they were abroad for awhile.
I figured I'd get some fabric and make a blanket and get a book.  Well, I didn't like anything in the fabric shop - so A-Man and I kept trucking.
Then I figured at least a book would be nice and if I have time to whip up something - I'll try!

While shopping for books (and discovering this fantastic one about intarsia - I'm a total newbie at knitting with multiple colours), A-Man disappeared.
I occasionally called his name out and he would come to me to check in, but when he didn't do that, I got concerned.
I paid for my stuff upstairs, circled both floors three times and even checked the elevator.
No A-Man.

"HE'S GONE!!!" - My frantic text to the spouse...
(No response).

Then running back upstairs, realized the front doors are automatic.
I ran out and looked around and thought quickly where he would go by himself, that he knows.
A) Hesburger -across from me
B) McDonalds -opposite direction
C) Mestarin Herkku - a grocery store beneath Sokos -also across from me
D) The bus stop - down the hill

What direction am I supposed to f*cking go?!

Then I see the police!!
Hmm, ask them for help in finding my kid and perhaps have them think I'm a crappy mother OR - keep looking for him on my own...OR suck it up and ask them for help anyway?

Then I see him.  I see his little dark grey hat covered in colourful bugs, his beige puffy vest and his tear-streaked face...and all the panic I have whooshes  out of me.

He's sitting on the police officer's lap in the paddy-wagon that I'm staring down.
I rub my eyes and squint again and the police van is slowly cruising by because it's a pedestrian-only street and I run over to the van and wave to the passenger-side police officer.
He looks over at me and clearly my 2-year old recognizes me and starts bouncing wildly in the guys' lap.
They open the door and A-Man is screaming, "ÄITI!!!" (Mom in Finnish) and clinging to my neck...I'm crying and thanking the police officer and as they drive away, my 2-year old decides he must shove me aside and wave good-bye to his friends.
Yep - and scream, "HEI HEI!" (bye-bye) to his new BFFs.
Repeatedly...for a solid 10 seconds...

And of course everyone is already curious why this expat-lookin' lady ran up to a police van and how she could (obviously) possibly lose her child...
So once they saw A-Man, snot-running, tears drying toddler wave and scream good-bye to the police...there were lots of smiles and chuckles.

"Got him!" - my text to the spouse.
(No response.)

How far did he get?!
No idea - I forgot to ask.  It was about 15-20 minutes of his being lost - I was just happy he was back in my arms.
And I'm also glad he didn't take anything from the book store on the way out or pee on the officer's lap.

We went straight home from there and my face is all puffy from crying and embarrassment and when we walk in the door, SH looks at me and I asked him, "Did you get my messages?"
I'd like to think I used my calm as death voice...the scarier than screaming voice...
"Nooo....um why?  What happened?" - he goes to find it...it was in a coat pocket, in the closet with the door shut.
"What do you mean he went missing?"

After a repeat of what happened, he tries to not laugh.  Then he says (semi) proudly,
"Never thought he'd be in a cop car this young, huh?"

Seriously?!
BIMU

Benefits for My Autistic Son in Finland

I thought I would write something a little more personal in terms of family life here and how it affects me living in Finland.

Our (now) 4-year old son was diagnosed with Autism at the age of 2 - which you may have known already from reading my blog in the past.
Some benefits that we qualify for - are truly unique and I'm constantly amazed and grateful for all of it.

*This is based on my family's experience - so if you're interested in these services - contact your doctor or social workers to see what you qualify for.  I also reside in Jyväskylä - so different cities or districts may have variations to benefits.  
Please also note that residents of Finland pay a lot in taxes - so they're not technically "free".  These are government or city-funded.*

• Domestic Aids - these are people who are there to help you with your basic living/quality of life.  They can be hired to clean your home, care for your children (in your home so you can sleep properly or even outside - so you can get stuff done), they do grocery shopping or running errands for seniors etc. Contact your Neuvola for more information.   
• Your child doesn't have to be disabled for this service!!!!  
• Free (limited) therapy sessions- both speech (and recently) occupational.  You have to have formal requests from the doctors and fill out all kinds of paperwork - but I promise you - it's worth it.  We are thrilled with our speech therapist and our occupational therapist for our son is also lovely and patient too.
• Free Diapers - this only applied to us once our son turned 3 and proved he refused to potty repeatedly.  So I believe it's 3 or 4x a year - we can call this hotline and have diapers delivered to our door for our son.  The city will pay for up to 5 diapers (maximum) per day and that's how many you get.  You have to set up a delivery time and date and if you're not home to pick up the order - they'll just drop it off at the nearest post office...which would really suck if you don't have a vehicle to carry it all in...About 4-6 packages of diapers fit in each box and you get 4-5 boxes (depends on the size of diapers and how many per package etc.).
• "Extra caregiver benefits" - once a month we are awarded from the city a sum of money that helps us with all the extra bits we may need for our child or for ourselves.  Loosely speaking - it's more or less money to help us make it through the month and not stress about things so much because caring for a child with special needs can be very exhausting.
• With this benefit plan set by the city and our social worker - because we do not have family here (not that it's a requirement) - we also are able to have our child stay overnight at a special place where he gets 24 hours a day round-the-clock supervision and care.  Pretty much an overnight day-care (some are held in another family's home - that is specialized in handling and caring for children with special needs) that allows us a break from him and he gets a break from us for 3 whole days and nights per month.
• I was really hesitant about this "Overnight Care" (respite) for my son and felt like an awful parent for using this service (we get billed afterwards - approximately 30€ a month for those 3 days and nights) - but it's really helped us as a family in terms of being able to do things with our younger son and even being able to go out on a date once a month...because it's a lot easier to find a sitter who can handle a "normal/average child" than handle both a busy average child and one who is Autistic too.
• We have less stress in our marriage and with our youngest - who often starts trouble to get more attention (and I can't blame him) -  because we're constantly busy with our oldest's needs - knows that when big brother is gone...he gets a break too.
• "Disability Benefits for a child under 16" - this is tax-free income and paid once a month via Kela.
• Free Day-Care - the reason a family can qualify for free day-care is because day-care in Finland is based on the total household income.  Another reason a child can receive free day-care is because it's part of their rehabilitative program pertaining to their disability.
• Taxi Service - this is provided to our son only (so myself or spouse cannot hop in for a ride too) - so he can be transported to and from his day-care.  It's not an easy service to qualify or be approved for - as I have other friends who applied for years before they were accepted (or they were not accepted at all).  Every week-day that he goes to day-care - a taxi picks him up at 7:30am and drops him off by 3pm.
• Why we applied for it:
• We don't have a car to get him to day-care and it's over 3 km away from our home (45 minutes and without snow to push a stroller through - snow could or ice can easily add another 30 minutes depending!).
• I tried to take him by bicycle (with him in a child's seat) and he freaked out so much and grabbed my back-pack and we nearly fell over, while speeding down a hill.
• My other child goes to a different day-care quite close to our home.  
• I have to be at school for 8am (class starts at 8:15) - so if I did drop him off by taking the buses - I would be late everyday for class...especially if he's having a difficult time settling down.
• My husband does have to go to his office regularly and also takes the dogs out in the morning (I do the evening shifts) so I can get to school on time.

Since having this extra help - it's been a lot easier being able to live in Finland with a disabled child.  

I am truly grateful for everything we have and don't take any of it for granted because I know in Canada - we wouldn't get half of these services.
BIMU

Originally posted on November 24, 2013 in my Learning About Finland blog.

Learning About Finland: Enterorrokko Style

Enterorrokko is not the name of a brand of clothing or a Finnish designer.
Nor is it the name of Jyväskylä's newest Japanese sushi bar...because Jyväskylä doesn't have one of those currently.
Why, it's the latest trend among the Finnish day-care kids!!
It's also known in English as "Hand, Foot, Mouth Disease" - a lovely virus involving someone interacting with poop at some point and not washing their hands properly...and the love from that blossoms into a virus and is super duper highly contagious!  Then one kid drools on something (or kisses another as my kid is known for at his day-care...) and it spreads like wild fire.

How do we know?

Because last Friday, the day-care staff said A-Man wasn't himself.  Alright...we got home and popped "Disney's Frozen" in the dvd-player and waited...

"Let it go" played and he didn't sing or dance at all.  Yep - he's probably ill.
He refused food...he had a fever through the weekend (38*C +)...he vomited at one point...lacked an appetite...slept a lot...
Then Sunday came and that was the worse.  He developed these little red spots and they didn't seem to bother him until Monday.
I was so sure it was chicken pox but there were so few and they were mostly on his legs and wrists...I did change the laundry soap recently but he would've had a reaction prior to last weekend....

So I took him to the emergency and after waiting nearly an hour (which is awesome compared to waiting in a Canadian waiting room for something "minor" like this) - the doctor took a look down his throat and listened to his chest and said he has "Enterorrokko".
Because it's a virus - there's absolutely nothing we can do but give pain medicine because those red spots turn into blisters and they'll make his skin feel like it's on fire.  Also, inside his throat was covered in these blisters and she recommended that he eats ice-cream or something cold to help soothe the pain.

Within 3 days he's fine, my oldest had a fever and 1 spot on his hand...and my little girl has some blisters between her finger and thumb (she's a finger/thumb sucker) and some blisters on her wee little tongue.

But so far - we're surviving and you can too.
I strongly recommend loads of coffee, sugar or caffeine and a nap when you can!
BIMU

3 and Done Counting...

Ever since dating SH/D (Super Hubby/Dad), I nearly stopped watching television.  It wasn't something he did and it wasn't something I was obsessed with.
I suppose growing up a Trekkie's daughter may have something to do with that...not that I prefer Star Trek over other shows - but I just wasn't exposed to the stuff on television (nor did I have a say in what was played - but who does when living at home with parents?)...and I'm partly glad because a lot of stuff on television surprises me.

I truly wonder what producers think when they're having their meetings.
"We don't have a show about little girls going through pagent show try-outs and the stress it puts on families...yes let's do that....we don't have a show about weird eating habits/cravings...now we do...and let's find families with such strong values that half the world will think "YES! This is what and how raising a family should be about!" and the other half will keep channel surfing..."

Well, I freely admit that I would be a couch potato if exposed to cable television.  I love a bag of chips and salsa or fresh guacamole...or flavoured cream cheese for dip...
I guess you get my point...mmm food....

While I may not have my digibox set up (the thing that provides cable in Finland) - I do keep myself fairly current with celebrity news.  Yep - small guilty pleasure and I usually stick with Huffington Post or People's websites.

And I think all of North America know the family, the Duggars.  Yes, the show about an American family who currently have 19 children (and counting!), some grandchildren and apparently another grandchild on the way!
Their strict commitment to religion isn't what interests me and to be honest, is what put me off from watching the show.
That and the whole, "We'll hold hands once we're engaged then we'll have our first kiss at the altar and then regular old-fashioned intimacy stems from there."
I just am shocked but moreso impressed that the younger Duggars are able to stick to it.
Hormones are a powerful thing!  But if you are extremely religious, as they seem to be, then perhaps it's not as hard as us outsiders see it.

I told the SH I was curious if their show was available online and he looked at me asking why in the world I'd watch their show.
Because I'm neutral about pretty much everything when it comes to religion and politics - he was surprised I'd be interested in their life.
I think for me, I'm merely curious about how 1 person can manage to keep their sanity while raising so many children!
Okay, so the oldest boy is married off and has started his family...there's another girl who just got married and 2 months later announced her pregnancy...and a third daughter who is engaged to someone younger than herself.
Even still - that still leaves 17 children in the house - plus that fiancee moved in I guess...so 18.
And yeah, there's 2 sets of twins...BUT STILL!

HOW DO THEY DO IT?!?!?!?!

I had to know.  So I looked up their website.  As I mentioned earlier, it was not the religious part that interested me but moreso the daily routines...the organization...the hobbies and lifestyle...the cleaning and the vacation...the gas...the FOOD...the bills...the team work...
I just had to know how they did it.
I haven't started to watch it but I did look at the FAQs and that's when I had an "OMG really?!" moment.
I was flipping through Michelle's blog and the financial bits caught my eye and then there was this one:  "Do Jim Bob and Michelle believe in spanking?"
In Finland, it is illegal to spank or hit your children.

So in short, no, they don't believe in spanking.
Her philosophy is simple:  Praise the kids 10x over publicly but correct them privately.

It finally dawned on me after reading that blog post of hers that I have it pretty good.
I have 3 kids, relatively close in age.  Sure - one is autistic and one is mixing his languages and the third is constantly starving (both for food and attention it seems) and ready to bash her head in from trying to stand alone completely already (not even 8 months...good grief!)...
And we have 3 and are done counting...
 
Anyways, I have decided to adopt the same policy and I have noticed a huge difference already - and it's only been two weeks.
I'm calmer because of that one single blog post...I tolerate a lot more (even when running on less than 5 hours of sleep and 0 caffeine of any kind) and A-Man is listening a lot better.
I used to spaz if he didn't walk as fast and I'd be urging him to go because we have to catch a bus and so on...but now, I say it in a positive happy-go-lucky but firm voice (instead of the Momster voice) and he moves faster. 

But there are some things I won't do with A-Man for example, to ensure that we don't get to the "Momster" side of me.
I bypass the candy and sweets aisle like the plague...toy section too with him.
If I know I have to go to that aisle for whatever reason - I bring V-Man or M-Girl (or both).  0 fights and I'm calmer and everyone is much happier.

So Michelle - thank you for saving my sanity.
BIMU

Learning About Finland: Banking Blues

My husband received a new bank card in the mail several months ago but got stressed out that it said, "MASTER CARD" on it and thought they issued him a credit card that we didn't ask or apply for.
So he didn't use it or activate it.
Our bank is with Danske (previously known as Sampo) and it's fine - the cards usually work (on occasion mine has just not worked for whatever technical reason) and the internet banking is available in English.
We went with them and have been with them since moving to Finland 5 years ago because his supervisor recommended and dealt with them as well.

I noticed my card had an expiry date of 08-2014 but didn't receive a card for whatever reason.
After being declined for multiple purchases (after already using the card for the same day) and knowing there were enough funds for my purchases - I went to the bank in a huff.
Turns out they mailed it in May but I never received it.  They immediately requested a new card for me to receive within a week and that was that.

I got my new bank card, one with a Master Card logo on it and the tap to pay feature on it (for purchases maximum of 25€) and it worked right away.
My letter which explained the features of the card and that they were no longer using the Visa Electron name was written in English.
*You have to use the card to activate it - in person - and use your same pin code.  Then you'll be able to use the tap to pay feature.
I personally don't like that feature because I think it would be so easy to have money spent from your account if you lost your card!
10€ here, 5€ there, 25€ here and there and it just adds up - you know?
However I don't think it's possible to get that removed...too bad.

Anyways, I convinced my husband and showed him my letter - because his was in Finnish (excellent customer service by the way...the bank knows we're Canadian and don't speak Finnish very well...especially him!) - that it was not a credit card but just their new logo they're going with...and that he should use it soon.
He nodded and didn't think twice about it.

Well, guess what happened to him?
He went to Helsinki for a work meeting and his card was fine until he took a cab home really late at night.  Card was not only declined - but the taxi driver was instructed by the machine to keep the bank card and return it to the bank.
Thankfully my husband had enough cash for the cab fare but he was deeply embarrassed.

So just in case this happens to you - know that your bank should send you your bank card about three to six months in advance - depending on your bank!
Ooh and my bank card now has service in English.  So when I'm at the bank machine now, the options are in English and when I make purchases too.
But my husband's still registers in Finnish.  Thankfully he knows the basics. :)

BIMU

Learning About Finland: Huuto.net Purchase

If you didn't know, Huuto.net is the Finnish equivalent of EBay.
You create an account and user name and once approved, you can bid, sell or buy.

I shop there every so often for movies, video games and books...sometimes the odd craft supply or tool but I enjoy it.  It's completely in Finnish and that's fine for me.
If I'm interested in something, I always check the reviews of the seller to ensure they have at least 95% positive reviews and if there are any neutral or negative reviews - that they're not too serious.

Well, for a few days last week - the hubby wanted an Xbox One console.  They're coming out this week to City Market and other shops in Jyväskylä.
I thought I would try my luck on Huuto.net and I struck big with a guy who even lives in Central Finland and got his this past January in Germany!
Well, there was back and forth bidding and finally we decided to purchase it for the asking price - since the video games that were included (x3) were at least 60€ each in store (even second hand!).
So it was a great price.

I messaged the seller and we arranged a time and date for drop-off.
So I went up to our meeting location near my home (our drive way is too hard for people to find usually) and carried M-Girl with me.
I spotted the car and this tall young man with half his head shaved (bottom half), the remaining hair tied up in a small top knot, wearing big black leather coat with spikes and black jeans ...
I waved at him, introduced myself and him too and he asked where I'm from.
He showed me the Xbox One and everything was in mint condition as promised.  So as I was counting out money for him, he asked the baby's name and I asked if he's Finnish.

"Oh yes, 100 percent."
I thought this was highly entertaining...and when he heard about our choice in children names and that no, I am not married to a Finn, he was pleased and impressed and his voice softened to a "aww coochy coo" baby voice when I said M-Girl's name.
Yep big softy.




So I went home and gave him a positive rating and a nice compliment for being punctual and good with communication etc.
I received one back saying, that it was one of his easiest transactions and thanks again.


And I'm happy to say that I haven't had ANY negative experiences with Huuto.net that weren't fixed quickly by the seller (one time I had to pay extra for the postage when I picked up a package and I was quickly reimbursed by her).

So, just be careful that you make sure the seller has positive customer/buyer reviews, make sure you understand what the product includes and postage fees and go from there :).
BIMU

PS The Xbox One is bigger than the Xbox 360, can play Bluray and be hooked up to your older model Xbox because you cannot play older model games on the new One system.

Bus Cards in Jyväskylä

In Jyväskylä, you can pay 3,30€ (as of August 2014) for a one trip fare.  You'll be given change back and a slip that has the time stamped on it.
You can use that slip on another bus (0-9km) within 1 hour from the time stamped on it.

When I first moved here it cost 2,60€ or something awkward like that and steadily increased by about ten cents every 6-12 months.
I started getting tired of remembering to carry cash with me and it was adding up.

So I bought a bus card and the blue one gives you the option of 10 or 40 trips.  You can share it with another person and there might be a student discount as well.
But when winter came, I started using the bus more to avoid slipping on ice or having to walk home in the freezing cold with a baby...
I then looked at the red card - which has a 30 days un-limited usage and works out to be so much cheaper, as I was re-loading the blue card once or twice a month! Eeek!
The only thing is that you cannot share this red bus card!! 
That's because when you purchase a red one, they require identification (also proof if you're a student) so they can list your birth date on it.

How do I know?  Because mine was confiscated once when my husband had to drop off some library books and the driver kept the card and took it to the headquarters.
The headquarters were in the middle of nowhere and it was -35*C that day...so I suppose it was karma biting me on the frozen nose.

When you press the red bus card on the scanner, it'll display MIES or NAINEN (man or woman) and the date you can use the card last.
When the card is close to needing to be reloaded (unless you pay the one year) - the lights go from green to orange/yellow.  If it doesn't work - it'll light up red and make a horrible beeping sound.
You can reload your bus card at Sokos (1st floor at the lotto booth) or with the driver in cash, credit card but I don't think a bank card works (I could be wrong!).

When you press a blue card on the scanner, it shows you how many trips you have left and also the date.
If you're paying for someone else, it'll show the date as well and " 1/1" (same as if you use your card twice within the hour).

Green cards are for students only - as you may have noticed, there aren't official school buses here.  I heard from a Finnish friend that they do exist in the country side sometimes.

The handy thing about the bus cards as well, is that they include a reflective holder and you can keep your bus card in your mitten in the winter or in your wallet and press it on the electronic pad (if your wallet isn't too thick!).
Or you can just press the card itself without the holder.
Also, you're not charged extra if you take the bus late at night, where if you pay by cash - you get charged nearly double for a single fare.

Here's the site to the JKL Linkki bus line.
You can find the time table PDF there too and of course the fares.
Children aged 0-6 years old go for free with a parent/guardian/adult (2 children per 1 paying adult).
Excludes line 13M.
Veterans with proof also go free on the bus now - which I think is lovely.

My Jogging Journal: Day 2 - Complete (and then some)

Today was a doozy of a day!!! I did a lot of running around while carrying M-Girl on my back in a hiking-style carrier (Deuter Kids Comfort III) and am certainly feeling it.

After getting A-Man from daycare and contemplating a Fitbit (wrist style pedometer and sleep tracker thing), I swapped kids and clothes for my 2nd jogging session with V-Man.

Poor kid has new sweat pants and they're always slowing us down before we leave the driveway!!! (Complete drop to his ankles....)

I went the same route as last night and he wouldn't have it. I don't know if it was because there was a lady with three barking dogs nearby or what. But today, even with a block in his hand, he didn't want to run forward.
I was cheering him on and he'd stop suddenly and began his "boulder pose"....where he doesn't kick up a fuss about not wanting to go somewhere.
He just simply doesn't move and I end up almost falling flat on my face every time he stops and crouches down to play with rocks.

We were only 10 minutes into our session and I was motivated to keep going but I am able to see a lost battle before it begins with V-Man.
So we turned around and then he made a wild dash...

I managed to get him to not go home but onto a wide sidewalk and we continued our jog/walk.
Yes, we jogged past cars with his wrist in my hand and off we went.
I managed to add an extra ten minutes or so onto the jog and felt good and he was enjoying himself and we were back to the jog a bit and walk a bit pattern.

Pulling into our driveway, I realized that my phone had fallen out of my coat pocket. We turned back to see if it was at the end of the driveway and it wasn't.
V-Man started to get fussy, so we ran into the flat and I grabbed SH's phone, my keys, a poop bag and Loki.

We bolted back the way I came and I didn't see my phone.
I was panicking because there were dark clouds rolling in and I just got my phone screen repaired!!!!
So I called myself and someone answered. She thankfully spoke English and said she'd wait for me near the woods.
I shouted that we'd be there in seven minutes and Loki took my energetic call as a sign he should race hard (he IS a Husky mix)...as if there was an all access to a room full of bacon, lamb bones and squeaky toys.
We got there in less than four minutes.

The lady was there as promised and said it was a good thing my phone has a bright yellow cover, because it might not have been seen otherwise.

This is one of the things I truly love about Finland.
Someone loses something and it will be left where it was found, or hung in a nearby bush or tree (so it doesn't get trampled on or peed/pooped on by dogs.
Or it's dropped off to the police (hubby's passport made a trip there once after falling out of his pocket)...or to the nearest open building.
She was planning on dropping it off to the nearest building that has a café in it so I could pick it up there, had I not called her (or if she couldn't reach my husband's phone number).

Recently, Helsinki was listed as one of the most honest cities in a "wallet test".
And this seems to be true of Jyväskylä as well, based on my experiences and many of my friends who have lost their keys, gloves and so on.

Can't believe it?
Well, I just lost my phone and last winter I forgot my mittens on a bus (super nice warm ones) and someone brought them up to the driver - who took them in to the bus headquarters.
Shortly after losing my mittens, a friend forgot her whole backpack which contained her wallet, passport, visa and other things in it on the bus.  It was returned to the driver.  She got everything back.

It's a wonderful feeling knowing that I live in a country that values the truth and honesty.
Of course it's not 100% perfect and there is the occasional shoplifting and bike stealing - but all things considering - Finland's doing a pretty good job.
BIMU

PS:  I think I will get the Fitbit (but second-hand)...I got a pedometer from a friend of mine and cannot seem to find the batteries for it - the proper thickness I mean.  I'll keep trying but I do predict a Fitbit in my near future.  I'll write a review of it later on! 

Learning About Finland: Sauna 101

A sauna in Finland greatly differs from the only sauna I've seen in Dartmouth, Nova Scotia (Canada) because of one big thing.

You go naked.  You go with friends (typically females stick together and the guys stick together) - or you go with your spouse.
Or you go with your whole family - both guys and gals!  (It's what we do...)

The first time I was invited to someone's sauna after dinner (husband's phD supervisor's place) - the ladies went together and I was 30 weeks pregnant and said bashfully, "I don't have my bathing suit."
Never mind the stretch marks galore!!
The ladies chuckled and said there wasn't one required and I shyly backed out.

After having given birth and visiting the same family again - it was just me and Jessica - the supervisor's wife who happened to be Canadian AND was my doula for my first labour...so I figured if she saw me push a child out of my hoo-ha (she knew the hair colour before I did - let's put it that way) - clearly it's alright to chill (sweat?) naked together in a sauna - right?

So that's what we did.

Sauna basics 101

• Don't wear pure metal jewellery - it'll melt and burn your skin.
• Regular gold and silver is fine.
• Don't wear contacts or eyeglasses - metal frames will get really hot and plastic ones will become very bendy (handy if you need to re-shape your frames - be careful though).
• Don't wear a bathing suit - everyone has the same bits and bobs.  Get over the nudity thing!!  You're not there to stare at the other people...you're there to converse, relax, try the sauna (and hopefully enjoy it) - it just so happens you're doing it naked.
• Bring your shower stuff and a towel.
• You can rinse in the shower (or bucket if a shower isn't available) before entering and typically you take a shower afterwards.  You can also rinse in between when you need a break from the heat!
• It's recommended children as young as 1-year old can go in sauna, usually in a bath tub on the bottom floor where it's really cool there still.  Some parents let their babies in earlier than that - it really helps them sleep well!
• Sit on a bench - the higher up you are (and closer to the stove) - the hotter it will be when someone splashes the water on.
• *If you have asthma (or faint easily or you're pregnant and it's your first time - be cautious with how long you stay in the sauna!) - bring your medicine with you and leave it in the changing area just in case.  My first time I went into sauna and the water was splashed on - I had a mild asthma attack.  True story.
• Ladies - if you're on your period - you can still do sauna.  Use a tampon or lady cup - and just in case, you can buy these sheets to sit on (like plastic coated paper towel) - or sit on a towel.
• You can buy sauna towels - they look a lot like long dish towels and can be found in the sauna section of the department stores.
• You can also add scented essential oils to the water bucket and splash that on the stove. 
• Saunavihta or Vasta are bundles of birch tree branches (found in the frozen section year round in grocery stores) and are commonly used around Midsummer and Christmas time.  
• You thaw them out (if not using fresh ones), soak them in water in the sauna, toast them above the stove then SLAP YOURSELF SILLY.  Seriously.  Keep reading for my first time with those branches... 
• Typically should be used freshly cut and the frozen ones used only in winter time when the leaves are gone otherwise for the season!
•  When you're finished your turn in the sauna - ensure the bucket of water is full and scoop some onto the bench area that you sat/laid down on. 
• Because it's so hot and you lose quite a bit of water via sweating - ensure you have a bottle of water in the changing room or another beverage of choice!

Other funny things about Finnish sauna:

• For a population of approximately 5.3 million, there are about  2 million saunas.  They can be found in the basement of a home or apartment building, in an apartment,  in a separate building at a cottage or household.
• There are electric ones (typical of apartment buildings) and wood-stove style ones. The wood stove ones are favoured because when the water is splashed on - the heat isn't as intense.
• There are sauna championships in Finland.  And yes, someone has died from it.  But I won't post that video!  A group of men and a group of women see who can last the longest in the sauna without leaving and while the temperature regularly gets hotter...
• It's perfectly acceptable, if at the cottage, to take a break from the heat of the sauna and go for a swim.  Even in the winter.  Someone will have cut a hole out in the lake and there's usually some handle bars and a ladder to enter and exit.  It's good for the blood circulation and if you can handle it - go back and forth!
• Or you can roll in the snow...
• "Sex, Sauna, Siivous" - the 3 S's in Finnish (sex, sauna and cleaning) are recommended for encouraging the labour of a pregnant woman to start. :)
• Way back when - Finnish women would give birth in their sauna.  Due to the high temperatures - it was one of the most hygienic places to give birth and the heat helped with the contractions etc.
• There are such things as co-ed saunas (bathing suits are usually involved unless the whole crew is trashed/drunk...)!!

Now back to that crazy birch branches story...

While pregnant with A-Man...I suppose this is 2010 or 2011- I went with our family to go visit some friends at their farm-house cottage...it was huge - hence the farm house part.
And we went to sauna - my pregnant self, my friend T (also pregnant - we were 3 weeks apart) and M (not pregnant but Finnish like T).
M noticed there was a bucket with pretty dark leaves and asked T if they were recently used and T said not yet but we were more than welcome to use them.

I honestly thought it was a decoration for the sauna...a bunch of greenery...
I had a clueless look on my face and the ladies smiled and asked if I had ever used these branches.  I confirmed their suspicions and they giddily dragged me into sauna.

"What do you do with them?"
"Oh, they're best if you soak them in some water first then toast them above the stove...then you do this... *CRACCCCCCCCCCCCCCCK!"
And so began the beating of each other with a bunch of birch branches...
My jaw dropped and my bladder was ready to explode from laughing so hard.  And all I heard was "crack, smack, crack, crack" and the ladies saying to each other how lovely it felt and I should really try it.
Because I'm so 50-shades and into beating myself and my friends with sticks...
I didn't hit myself hard enough apparently but they said that the birch oils are released and really help to moisturize and condition your skin and the slapping encourages blood circulation and good blood flow...

Last night, I went to sauna (wood stove) at a friend's cottage...it was awesome.  Then they asked me to go swim and I figured, why not?  M-Girl was asleep so I went.
I creeped into the water by squatting and shuffling forward...it was cold!!! 
Well, my Finnish friends were entertained - they just jumped in...and I just couldn't....so I creeped in until my butt was hovering on the water and kept warm (I honestly looked like I was pooping I'm sure)...and then immersed myself slowly...like the crazy Canadian that I am!

And because I think it's funny - one of my husband's first times in the sauna - with the supervisor's family - their son is bilingual and was learning all about the body parts.
I asked how it was after and he told me at home that the kid was trying to tap my husband's man bits and loudly cheered, "PENIS!" while pointing out everyone's junk in the sauna.
Just imagine - a 2-year old-ish kid...playing a bunch of guys' like bongo drums....

Welcome to Finland.
BIMU

Happy Finniversary To Me!

A Finniversary is a term I totally made up (maybe it existed before but seeing as I didn't know anyone living in Finland - I'll just roll with it) to reflect how many years I've lived in Finland.

I can hardly believe it!
2009 seems like last month and yet here it is - 2014!
Has 5 years really flown by that fast?  It seems so based on my household anyway - 3 kids (each two years apart) who were all born in Finland and have some seriously old-school Finnish names... and we still have those 2 dogs...

Why move to Finland?
SH began and completed his phD here.  So we packed up two dogs, as much stuff as we'd need for an initial 4-years contract (i.e. winter and summer clothes), missed some flights and so on - and while 26-weeks pregnant with V-Man - touched down in Finland on August 13, 2009.

What have you learned so far in the past 5-years?
That I love it here.  Sure some of the paperwork stinks (i.e. proving my marriage so my firstborn (and later children) could have a father listed) but other than that - it's a safe place.
I can walk my dogs out in the middle of the night without fear of being mugged or randomly beaten (or kidnapped and found a few months later in the woods)...I can leave my children to sleep outside in their stroller - yep even in the winter...
I do have lots of Finnish friends and I cherish them all because I know it might not be overly easy to make a Finnish friend but once you do - this saying is true: "A Finnish friend is a friend for life." 
Also the care and assistance we get here because of V-Man being autistic - awesome.  I really don't know how we'd survive in another country - even our own!  Not bashing any other country! - just saying that I don't know what kinds of health care is out there for young autistic children and when they get older - so I'm very grateful to be living here with my family.

In fact, I have learned so much about life in Finland that I had even started a blog, "Learning About Finland".
Oh, it's not linked and you can't find it?  Yeah me either.  And that's mostly because my e-mail was hacked into on July 2, 2014 and my blogger profile removed without my consent (as is the case with most hacking situations).

Turned out I had a keyboard hijacking program on my computer...and the ding dong that hacked my computer erased all of my e-mails and one of my BFFs managed to break back into my e-mail and change my password to something so absurd - it's not easy for the hacker to crack.
And I know you're still trying Mr(or Miss/Mrs) Hackity Poo.  I can still get into my old e-mail account and I can see all the recent activity of failed attempts of trying to break into it.
I am confident I know who it is and I'm sure if you were a previous follower or reader of mine - you'd have a rough idea too...but I won't spoil that part yet for awhile.

I also had a blog called "That Funny Mama" which was more like what this blog is now - food, crafts, life with my kids (especially super V-Man) and so on.

But thanks to technology and to the person who decided to imitate me and created some fake blogs with my name in it - I had a friend of mine copy all the data from the fake blog - not your fake rude/racists posts - just the stuff before it...and I'll find a way to in-put it into this blog.
Sure it'll take time - but like the police - resources are limited so time is aplenty! 
Sure I'll miss a lot of posts and funny experiences from my Learning About Finland blog - but that's alright.  I'm done being angry and am just happy knowing you're a sad, jealous person and I'm quite content continuing to collect more and more evidence that points you as the culprit.

Photo not mine - courtesy of a Google search for "Karma quotes" >Images.

And yes, if you're hoping to delete ALL of the e-mails I had on my computer - the ones incriminating your work and hoping to save public face after the repeated times I debunked some things on your site - you're SOL (sh*t out of luck) pal.
I have those e-mails somewhere nice and safe...and printed copies which will be handed into the police.
Should you try again to figure out my new e-mail - I should probably give you a hand and let you know that I had sent all of the e-mails to other people - so I'll always have access to a digital copy of them.

I am a true believer in karma and what goes around comes around.

What do you miss about Canuckville (Canada)?
Friends and family, being able to watch my children grow up and play with my other friends' kids, My cats - who are staying with my in-laws thankfully!, various shops and Kraft Peanut butter!!

So what will you do now?
I plan to just keep trucking on.  Thankfully the hubster has another contract with another university here - so we're in Finland for a few more years yet! :)

Quick edit before I hit the sack!To all of our friends in Finland who have helped us translate Kela papers, set up things for our family (i.e. bank accounts, appointments etc.), introduced us to other people and help drive us to and from places - WE THANK YOU.
Thanks to you - we've made a life here and are proud to call Finland our home.
Paljon kiitos.

Anyway, enough of that - it's time to move on and up with this blog!
WAHOO! have a good one!
BIMU

 PS: I haven't directly mentioned who probably hacked that blog but if it magically disappears - then I'm sure it's the same person behind everything.
The hacking of my e-mail, my blogs, the comments on my blog harassing me, the creator of the fake blogs (including stolen photos of my boys) all boil down to one (maximum two) people.
Update Aug. 23, 2014 - take a look on the right-hand side of my blog and you'll see "Learning About Finland".  Click there to find all my posts that involve my experiences in Finland! :)  Think of it as me re-working and re-writing my history here but in a much pinker blog! :)